Dancing With The Stars: The Former NFL Player Is The First One Kicked Off The Show

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

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Keyshawn had to have his shoes specially made by a shoemaker in Costa Rica.

HOLLYWOOD - Season 17 of Dancing With The Stars has seen its first elimination.

Host Tom Bergeron announced that the first celebrity contestant to leave was former NFL wide receiver Keyshawn Johnson, 41.

Johnson was paired with the extremely sexy Australian dancer Sharna Burgess who has a million dollar smile and a two million dollar body.

The crotchety English judge Len "The Grouchy Grouch" Goodman said that Keyshawn's samba resembled a modified mambo with a bit of hip hop, rap, and Eskimo moves tossed in.

Carrie Ann Inaba, alias The Filipino Meano, said that she kinda liked his dancing but noted that she could not figure out why he chose to dance the entire dance routine while holding an NFL football.

Bruno "The Gaytalian" Tonioli giggled and said that watching Johnson move around was kind of like watching Len Goodman in his boxer shorts, it's funny, but it's also scary as hell at the same time.

Keyshawn thanked his dance partner Sharna and told the audience that she has the most erotically sexy thighs that he has ever seen.

SIDENOTE: Bill Ney, The Science Guy, who did not dance as well as Keyshawn reportedly won because he received 99.3 percent of the nation's MENSA vote.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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