Ashton Kutcher Says Demi Moore's Divorce Demands Are Not Acceptable

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 24 August 2013

image for Ashton Kutcher Says Demi Moore's Divorce Demands Are Not Acceptable
Ashton has said that towards the end of his marriage to Demi Moore it was like living in hell.

LOS ANGELES - Ashton Kutcher says that he has aged three years in just the past one year stressing over his pending divorce from his cougar wife Demi Moore.

Kutcher says that Moore has made it very clear that she is not going to let him get away with divorcing her as easy as he and his sweet little play thing Mila Kunis think.

It is no secret all over Tinsel Town that the 50-year-old Moore resents the fact that Kutcher, 35, dumped her to be with women who are half her age.

Moore knows that there was just no way that she was going to be able to hold on to her boy toy for very long.

Ashton has said that at first it was nice to be in a May-December marriage because he kind of felt like Antonio Banderas, who is married to the much older Melanie Griffith.

But he said that after a while, once the cellulite started appearing, along with her change of life mood swings he began to feel like he was living in the outskirts of hell.

Kutcher says that now Demi is telling him that she wants him to give her $9 million to help pay for any cosmetic surgery that she may have.

She also wants $4 million to buy shoes, bras, panties, and feminine hygiene products.

SIDENOTE: Ashton says he will not do it because it is a matter of principle. Meanwhile Mila tells him to give the evil, hate-filled bitch the friggin $13 million she wants so he can get rid of her before the situation turns into a Fatal Attraction.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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