Jessica Simpson Is Talking Divorce

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 16 August 2013

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Jessica says she wants to marry the father of her two children.

LOS ANGELES - The latest starlet to mention the dreaded "D" word is Jessica Simpson, who was a big hit as Daisy Duke in the 2005 movie The Dukes of Hazzard.

Simpson, who recently had her second child from fiancé Eric Johnson, spoke to Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo at a local Flamboyant Tortilla Restaurant in Pacoima.

The 33-year-old actress and singer expressed to Miss San Guacamole that she is really depressed at the fact that Eric keeps on putting off their wedding plans.

The longhaired blonde says that she knows exactly how Angelina Jolie and Kim Kardashian feel because she is in the same boat, the USS No Wedding.

Simpson admitted that she has talked to Eric about it countless times and each time he changes the subject and starts talking about NASCAR, or the Paula Deen Scandal, or the fact that Lindsay Lohan needs to go in and have some of her freckles removed.

Jessica confided to Fajita that she has even talked to her obstetrician Dr. Zimanetto Yovanovich, her gynecologist Dr. Ashwani Raheem Mumbidibad, Jr., and even her pool man Bobby Billy Fiddlefax.

SIDENOTE: Jessica mentioned to Miss San Guacamole that if Eric does not marry her by Halloween she is going to pay a visit to the highly reputable California law firm of Gorgonzola, Gomez, & Granolawitz about putting the divorce in motion.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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