HOLLYWOOD - The 84th Annual Academy Awards Show went on fairly smooth, but the same cannot be said for the pre-show Red Carpet segment.
As American Idol host Ryan "Peaches" Seacrest was interviewing Admiral General Aladeen of the country of Wadiya the dictator suddenly leaned towards Seacrest and spilled the urn which he alleged contained the ashes of North Korea's Kim Jong-Il.
The ashes, or actually Bisquick Pancake Mix, covered Ryan's $9,000 Beau Brummel Brothers coat. Seacrest was not amused but he handled the incident with dignified dignity.
Tittle Tattle Tonight's Pico de Gallo noted that Joan "The Moan" Rivers upon hearing what Cohen had done remarked that if he had pulled that stunt with her she would have jumped in his face and bitten his nose off.
The "Queen of Mean" added that she would have then taken her can of mace, which she carries in her Liz Taylor Designer Purse, and sprayed the two listless, Stepford-looking Wadiyan female freedom fighters that were standing next to the man she calls Sacha Boring Cohen.
3T reported that after The Academy Award Show, Ryan Seacrest filed a formal complaint against the military clown on grounds of Second Degree Blatant Double A Battery with Habeas Intent to Inflict Pseudo Ipso Ex-Post Facto Powderization.
Ginger Allred, a noted attorney representing Ryan Seacrest and the Hollywood Entertainment Industry Federation has noted that The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has already issued a press release stating that Admiral General Aladeen AKA Sacha Baron Cohen, AKA Borat Sagdiyev, AKA Skippy Fickyweather has been fined $100,000 for his sophomoric, self-promotional stunt.
SIDENOTE: The motion picture film distribution agency known as Hither and Yonder Inc. has issued a statement declaring that they are seriously considering not distributing Borat's latest movie The Dictator due to a tremendous backlash of protests from the LaLaLand film community which includes over 6,000 extremely rich and highly influential dues paying members.
