Complaints Pour in Over Earthquake Early Detection Kits Sold in California

Funny story written by Charpa93

Monday, 14 March 2011

image for Complaints Pour in Over Earthquake Early Detection Kits Sold in California
Water movement may indicate seismic activity

The California Attorney General's Office is being flooded with complaints from consumers regarding a new earthquake detection kit being sold in various discount stores and on the internet.

The kit, which goes by the name of "Quake Awake" is marketed as an easy-to-use earthquake detection system. The complete kit comes in an eye-catching red box with bright lettering and makes the following claims:

*Detect earthquakes before they happen
*You don't need a Ph.D. to detect earthquakes
*No fancy gadgets
*Easy to read and understand
*Save lives
*So simple a child can use it

The "kit" itself contains a clear see-through 8 oz drinking glass and instructions on how to use it:

(1) Simply remove the earthquake detection device and set it on a table or desk in plain view.
(2) Fill the detection device half-way with water.
(3) Check water occasionally to make sure it does not move.
(4) If the water moves, prepare for an earthquake.

Retailers claim the kits are coming back into their stores as fast as they are flying off the shelves due to the fact that users have detected the water moving at various times without there being seismic activity in the area.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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