H&R Block Refuses to Pay Struggling Artist for Fountain.

Funny story written by anthonyrosania

Wednesday, 27 October 2010


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Some might say it's a case of David versus Goliath as a small business tangles with a big corporation.

Just what Kansas City needed...

Another f--king fountain.

Is this a True story?

Of course not. It's satire!

In this case, however, Goliath is 55 years old, incontinent, with Down's Syndrome and suicidal tendencies: H&R Block.

The fountain behind the H&R Block's jade monolithic corporate headquarters in Kansas City, MO is one of the most beautiful sculptures in the city, but Block has yet to pay for it.

"We are here to ask why we can't get paid," said Huwar Jacks, the Kansas City artist that artistsed the fountain, for which Jacks said he is owed $19,000.

"I'd sue them," said Jacks. "But attorneys are too expensive, so I will have a news conference, calling Block out. Maybe some bad press will force them to do what's right."

"Bwa haaaaa haaaaa HA!" roared Alan Bennett, CEO of the HMS Titanic... er, the tax preparation company. "H&R Block compelled to do the right thing just because of bad press? HA, hahahaha! Nothing will compel us to do the right thing."

"Google our company name," Bennett continued. "We haven't had a postive news article written about us since 1973."

"I believe that Jacks could put what is called a 'Mechanics' or Artisan's Lien' against the company," said legal expert Anthony Rosania. "In that case, the money owed to him would be secured by the value of the company itself until Jacks is paid, and the lien satisfied."

"In other words, as long as H&R Block is solvent and profitable, Jacks will get paid for his work," concluded Rosania.

"H&R Block solvent and profitable?" asked Jacks.

"I'm f--ked."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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