Written by CamoDude

Friday, 20 August 2004

image for A Broke, International Olympic Committee Forced To Ask Bill Gates For Money
Bill Gates, pictured above, rejecting the possibility about loaning money to Olympic athletes

ATHENS, GREECE-- With a slump in ticket sales and empty seats that haven't been filled, the International Olympic Committee is facing a major issue. Over the last few years they have accumulated over 30 billion dollars in debt and expenses for a numerous amount of things.

"We didn't know it would end up costing this much to just set up a few arenas, swimming pools, tent, etc." said Tom Nelson, president of the committee. "But, this is getting out of hand, and it's only getting worse," he added. "We thought the U.S. would come through like they do in everything else and bring tourists and spend money."

It's apparent that big names such as Michael Phelps, the guy that one all of those medals in swimming, and Carly Patterson, that real good gymnast, are failures in other parts of life. And, that's winning ticket sales. Ticket sales are at an all time low for these games in Athens. Not even the anniversary of the first Greek games or whatever is helping either.

So, Tom Nelson contacted Bill Gates as a last resort on the possibilities of a loan. Here is what Bill had to say from his plush mansion in Beverly Hills, California.

"Ha, ha. I knew this day would come at some point in my life," laughed Gates. "The day that "jocks" would want to borrow money from me," he added. "The same "nerd" that they always pushed, punked and bullied in high school." "Well, the answer is NO!!"

Once Tom Nelson and the International Olympic Committee heard about this, they planned to take physical action promptly. They showed up to Gates' mansion and caught him in the driveway. Nelson immediately gave Bill a wedgy and an unnamed assailant picked Gates up by his ankles emptying the contents of his pockets.

The committee quickly collected numerous amounts of credit cards and one billion dollars in cash and fled.

Bill Gates then told our reporters that the joke was on them. He said that he has a secret button he can push on his car keys. This button will notify all of his creditors, thus making all of his cards obsolete. "The "nerd" always wins," he smiled.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Money, Bill Gates

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
123 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more