Monumentous astrological aspects for Chevron AGM 'Gunfight at the OK Corral' wannabes

Funny story written by queen mudder

Saturday, 23 May 2009

image for Monumentous astrological aspects for Chevron AGM 'Gunfight at the OK Corral' wannabes
Chevron lawyers ain't fooled by Opus Dei's cretinous boring tool,

San Ramon, Ca - (Big Oil Mess): Wednesday spells Doomsday for Ecuadorean mobster conspirators Trillium Asshole Management in their sudden death shoot-out challenge at the Chevron AGM.

The day's stupendous Jupiter-Neptune conjunction occurs at 26 degrees of the water bearer/crude pipeline carrier Zodiac sign of Aquarius.

The aspect is guaranteed to fire the Supermajor's big guns' most lethal opening salvo at the late nutjob Joan Bavaria's posturing self publicity freak show.

"We ain't fooled by any gung-ho scaremongering from Opus Dei's cretinous boring tool," a source close to the oil corporation's biggest partners said today.

The Trillium Grandiflorum Ovatum Erectum subdivision was hired by George W Bush's bastard son Rafael Correa, President of Ecuador, to facilitate the embezzlement of $27 billion from Chevron's war chest.

As a technical precaution butlletproof protective clothing will be standard issue for all bona fide Chevron stockholders.

The move follows a concerted hate campaign against respected scientist and Chevron Director Sam Armacost.

Dickless Cheney is on sordid bastard.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more