Edible organic freerange free-trade macrobiotic thongs, G-strings and breast-shaped stress relievers all the rage for Xmas

Funny story written by queen mudder

Saturday, 15 November 2008

London - (Yule!-Be-Sorry Mess): High Street Xmas shopping sales are booming at last following the London launch of edible organic freerange free-trade macrobiotic nipple-tassels, thongs, G-strings and breast-shaped stress relievers.

This week's launch at BhS - British Homoerotic Stores - also saw the gay version of the tantalising comestibles which all come with their very own juicy packaging.

"The Strawberry Spilt-Beaver lesbian lollies are selling like hotcakes," a BhS sauce said today.

"You can pop one in your mouth, or wherever, suck on it a bit and enjoy a wonderful tingling sensation within a few minutes."

Tubes of chili-flavored anal lubricant are also said to be flying off the shelves as are vegan-certified tubs of brazilian waxing lard.

"This could be a best selling recipie to beat the recession doom mongers," a Retail Consortium spoeksman said today.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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