HSBC is next for bankruptcy analysts say

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 15 September 2008

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$500 billion black hole in HSBC officially reported figures

Off-the-Wall St, NYC - (Ass Mess): Leading financial shrinks say that Asian banking giant HSBC is next for the knackers' yard after a $500 billion black hole emerged in its official accounts.

"This London-based Hong Kong racket bears all the hallmarks of seriously delusional practices," industry analyst Prof V Smart (FRCPsych) said today.

"Ever since UK's New Labour got their snouts in the trough the corruption of the Triads' favorite bank has gone stratospheric," Smart added.

Off-the-Wall Street sources have likened the last decade of corrupt HSBC management practices to a massive psychotic episode in Chinese business mentality.

A huge CIA/MI5 transatlantic security operation is waiting to pounce on ex-HSBC chairman Sir John Bond and a number of his London accomplices.

"Without HSBC complicity there'd never have been the Japanese element of Hari-Kari in the 9/11 atrocity," our-man-in-the-know said today.

Ex-HSBC stooge John Studzinski is shitting bricks.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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