Black Friday becomes Black Week becomes Black Month becomes Black Year!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Tuesday, 24 November 2020

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People, they are sucking your creditcards dry, just like over-milked cows!

(NOT EDITED) Black is beautiful claim global conglomerates as Black Friday approaches once again. However, internet businesses are now milking (is milk still white?) the Black Friday cow until it is totally dehydrated!

Amazon, Ali Baba, and other giant internet retailers, have decided to extend the Black Friday thing like a piece of Granny's elastic keeping up her saggy bloomers!

No more Black Friday, now we have Black Week, and listening through the grapevine, Jaggedone has found out, next year there will be a Black Month, and from 2022, a Black Year! Amazon are also considering a Black decennium, meaning everything will be dirt cheap year after year after year!

Punters sucked into the 'shop, shop. shop, until you drop syndrome' are over the moon that 'big-boy' retailers are bunging everything in their stocks at them for mega discounts! However, every 'Black Stocking' has a 'Black Adder', oops sorry, 'Black Ladder', spreading from top to bottom, and mega-huge retailers, are emptying people's pockets as fast as a bottle of sour milk (is that still white?) being binned down the plug-hole!

Creditcard suppliers are hiding their interest rates making it so attractive for punters, that they don't even notice until the first of January! Then 'Black Doomsday' arrives, and suicide rates rocket up like Amazon sales on Black Friday!

Jaggedone agrees, Black Lives Matter!! But as for Black Friday, Black Week, and Black Month, fuck em all! Give me a White Christmas anytime because walking in wonderful, fresh crunchy snow don't cost a penny, but then again, where's the fucking snow?

Oh, we have global warming disasters, and a Corona pandemic is blocking Apres Ski, but WHO gives a fuck as long as we can 'SPEND, SPEND, SPEND!'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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