China Tells Trump "Stop Punching Yourself!"

Written by C/L

Tuesday, 14 May 2019

image for China Tells Trump "Stop Punching Yourself!"
"You Americans hate to pay for anything. When you want something for nothing, you end up getting nothing".

WASHINGTON-US. Idiot President Donald Trump on the topic of his imbecilic trade war.

Beijing has stated that the United States has been losing billions of dollars from its economy because of US capitalists who have been pursuing higher profits, by closing down manufacturing in America, to pursue cheap labor in the developing world, since the 1970s. "You have all basically fucked yourselves!"

American consumers love getting something for nothing. This has also driven a stake into the heart of manufacturing over the past forty years.

"You Americans hate to pay for anything. When you want something for nothing, you end up getting nothing."

In a catastrophic and moronic move to make the trade war even worse, Trump says he'll raise tariffs on $200 billion-worth of imports from China.

The president is very pleased with the effects of the trade war. "White nationalists, and dumb people at my rallies are very happy. I'm solidifying my fascist base very beautifully. After I've destroyed the liberal world, I will build a shining Idiocratic Empire where it once stood. Finally, stupid assholes like myself can rise to the pinnacle of humanity as we drive the rest of it to extinction!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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