'Better Business Bureau' Changes Name to 'Who Knows Business Bureau'

Funny story written by Catchthisdrift

Wednesday, 30 April 2014

Arlington, VA - The Better Business Bureau (BBB) is changing its name to "Who Knows Business Bureau" (WKBB). The change comes after the BBB gave itself a less-than-stellar rating at how it handles customer complaints when that customer files a complaint with the BBB about a business that is a member of the BBB.

Tim Kowlaski, acting head of the BBB, told reporters "We didn't really have a choice. If we're going to uphold our oath to provide consumers with solid information about their local businesses, then we feel compelled to let consumers know that we aren't that great at upholding that oath."

When asked to elaborate, Kowalski said "We're just basically going through the motions. If a business wants to join, we let them join. If a consumer asks us for help vetting a business, we send them a form letter saying the business is reputable. We don't know."

A local Arlington roofing company executive, on the condition of anonymity, told this reporter that he's been able to cut his company's expenses by almost one-half by using sub-par materials and hiring cheap illegal labor. But he keeps getting new customers. "Once you have that 'BBB' in your Yellow Pages ad, you're set. People, especially old people, see that BBB and assume we're on the up and up." He was angered by the BBB's change to become the WKBB. "Now, people are going to see the double you, kay, bee bee in our ad and think 'who knows whether this company is any good?'"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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