OPEC boss slams Scottish Separatists' North Sea oil shakedown plans

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 25 February 2014

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image for OPEC boss slams Scottish Separatists' North Sea oil shakedown plans
Brit government could do a lot worse than hiring Randy Mastro, bête noir of the Ecuadorian oil scam mob

Vienna, Austria - "It's just another crude heist," the head of business development at the Organization of Petroleum Exploiting Countries said today.

"Reminds me of 1975 when Carlos the Jackass attempted kidnapping all eleven OPEC oil ministers and ransoming the US Strategic Petroleum Reserve," Brent Viscous commented.

"The British government should hire NYC's mob-busting lawyer Randy Mastro soon as he's seen off the Ecuadorian racketeering rubbish."

The remarks branding Scottish Separatists a renegade shakedown syndicate salivating at the prospect of a hydrocarbons heist were welcomed by Big Oil interests everywhere including Manhattan, New York where Upstream, Downstream News USA published its own take on the Scottish scam.

The website is particularly critical of Scottish Nutters Party leader Alex Salmond, the alleged 'brains' behind the proposed North Sea rigs heist.

This afternoon a front page editorial posted pictures of the 1975 OPEC HQ raid by The Jackass and members of his sex-person team including Gabriele Kröcher-Tiedemann Hans-Joachim Klein and a youthful-looking Alex Salmond.

Rafael Correa is 69.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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