PITTSBURGH - President Obama is proud to make a very important announcement regarding the nation's military.
The president speaking before a convention of retired gas meter readers in Pittsburgh stated that he had just signed a contract with the helicopter division of McDonnell Douglas Aviation.
President Obama stated that the contract calls for McDonnell Douglas to build 7,000 one-man stealth helicopters which will be used by the four branches of the military.
He pointed out that each helicopter will be equipped with three air-to-ground missiles, as well as a grenade launcher, and a 6-Disc CD Player.
The president proudly said that there is no country on Earth who presently has this type of one-man stealth helicopter.
He commented that North Korea's Kim Jong Un had contacted McDonnell Douglas about the possibility of purchasing two or three of them.
But an inside source at McDonnell Douglas stated that Kim Jong Un was told that he would have better luck trying to get Megyn Kelly to divorce her husband and marry him.