New personal hygiene robot launched

Funny story written by Moose

Sunday, 21 July 2013

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BEDFORD, Mass. - July 21, 2013 -- myRobot corp is a leader in delivering robotic technology-based solutions, today announced the launch of a new myRobot Splooj® personal cleaning robot.

Splooj 330 takes a dangerous job and does it for you, using a high-velocity, four-stage auger to blast away warts, lice, dirt and clogs while brushing genitals clean.

"myRobot has sold more than 8 million home robots worldwide, by focusing on cleaning performance and innovation across the company's portfolio of home robots," said Geoff Beek, chief operating officer of myRobot Corporation. "Regardless of whether our robots are washing genitals or vacuuming floors, cleaning gutters or the pool, our global customers want high quality products with state-of-the-art technology that perform a single task exceptionally well. The Splooj 330 is the result of combining innovative research and customer feedback in our development process."

The releases of the Splooj 330 robot underscores the growing global acceptance of and demand for practical robots, particularly for performing automated personal maintenance tasks.

The myRobot Splooj 330: Cleans genitals on its own at the press of a button.

Enhanced cleaning performance. Smarter operational features. Splooj blasts away warts, lice, dirt and clogs while brushing genitals clean. Featuring a high-velocity, four-stage auger, Looj travels down your pants on its own, sensing and adapting to brush and debris to provide the most effective cleaning.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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