EU Trick Or Treaty? Pagan Feast Of Samhain Spells Death Of The Euro

Funny story written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 26 October 2011

image for EU Trick Or Treaty? Pagan Feast Of Samhain Spells Death Of The Euro
Angela Merkel at a Eurozone crisis meeting today (detail)

London - Astrologers are confident next Monday's feast of Halloween will see the final collapse of the long-running KGB ponzi scam of the Euro.

Some reckon a trillion dollar EU bailout attempt is horribly tainted by bad karma going all the way back to General de Gaulle's paranoid cosying up to Cold War tyrants - and his eponynmous grandson's ten year service as France's National Front member of the European Parliament.

The day, also known in Pagan lore as Samhain - or Summer's End - marks the 50th anniversary of the removal of Joseph Stalin's body from Lenin's Tomb in Moscow.

Just what the old Soviet bastard was doing shacked up in the same sarcophagus as the 4ft 10in syphilitic dwarf, remains an enigma.

However, the annual feastday is the Wiccans' traditional reap-as-you-sow harvest festival where decrepit old rubbish is tossed on the bonfire in a recreation of the ancient Egyptian's Festival of the Dead.

"We could see the remains of the Old Queen Mother rise from her grace-and-favor wormhole in Windsor Mausoleum," Castle curator Sir Peregrine Bastard-Appeaser CMG said today.

The Halloween warning has been widely dismissed followers of the Bernard Madoff school of macro economics - such as Angela Merkel - whose personal investment in maintaining the massive Eurozone fraud is second only to that of the Vatican.

Last week Italian prosecutors in a Vatican Bank money laundering and embezzlement trial estimated 95% of Papal investments are Euro-denominated.

Roberto 'God's Banker' Calvi has been dead since June 1982.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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