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Funny satire stories about Halloween

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Funny story: Pumpkin not picked for Halloween

Pumpkin not picked for Halloween

Pumpkin Gavin Williamson is feeling a bit down about not being picked for Halloween this year. The orange, round fruit is only small compared to the other Pumpkins and has many skin imperfections. 'This year was going to be my year' said the pi…

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Funny story: The Trumpkin

The Trumpkin

Some farmers from MAGA Iowa and Nebraska have been growing pumpkins, with a special mutant pumpkin named “The Trumpkin”. Now, all you MAGAs can enjoy a big fat hard-faced orange gourd on your front porches, with flicking light in its triangle eyes…

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Funny story: Death Kit for Mass Shooting Opossums

Death Kit for Mass Shooting Opossums

New Halloween cosmetic kits will soon be on the market – but these are special, just for those who find themselves in a mass shooting scenario. Ladies, how big are your purses? The kit comes in various sizes, with the compact version able to fit into…

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Funny story: WW3 Halloween or April Fool?

WW3 Halloween or April Fool?

Putin hasn’t really given a timeline on when he wants to start World War 3, but a Moscow insider has given a hint. “What is scariest time of year? Time when people think things are scary but they know no really cuz it’s holiday? Yes, my friend, is…

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Funny story: Halloween Costume Warning!!!

Halloween Costume Warning!!!

A warning has been issued concerning this coming Halloween in the USA. In certain states (Florida and Texas being the two most named), there are certain Halloween costumes that will not necessarily put candy into your child’s bag. In fact, they co…

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Funny story: Coming soon - the Steve Bannon Halloween Mask

Coming soon - the Steve Bannon Halloween Mask

Coming soon (to help pay for his lawyer’s fees) is the new Steve Bannon Halloween mask! Have you ever looked at Bannon and said, “Oh God, noooooooo! Hell hath been unleashed!” Ha ha, well now you can scare all your friends and their kids by don…

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Funny story: Russian Halloween

Russian Halloween

Hello. Welcome to Russia. Is Halloween. Let us go to first house. Hello, give me. Okay, what we have this house? Bullets. Yes, very good, Russian like to give and receive many bullets for the children. Next house. Hello, give me. Okay, this is…

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Funny story: Unsold Pumpkin commiserating with unsold Firework

Unsold Pumpkin commiserating with unsold Firework

In a local Tesco, unsold, slightly rotting Pumpkin Tim Claypole and unsold firework Christoper Biggins are commiserating about their fate. 'It is dreadful' bewailed Tim 'no-one wanted me. I was not taken into a toddler's home, to feel the love tha…

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Funny story: Pumpkin scared of Halloween

Pumpkin scared of Halloween

Plucky young Pumpkin Bobby Roberts has been told tales of what happens to Pumpkins at Halloween, and now, like all of us, he lives in a world of dread. 'I heard' bewailed Bobby 'that the lucky ones of us suffer all types of torment, and any unluck…

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Funny story: Donald Trump Halloween Masks Selling Off Shelf

Donald Trump Halloween Masks Selling Off Shelf

Donald Trump Halloween masks are already selling off the shelf. Some of these masks are selling with skeleton outfits (which is contradictory even for Halloween), while others are pre-packaged with wrinkled navy blue suits and red ties sold by the ya…

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Funny story: Rhode Island’s 8-Year-Old Dare Devil "Rocket Boy" Ends Up Crashing Into A Vietnamese Nail Salon

Rhode Island’s 8-Year-Old Dare Devil "Rocket Boy" Ends Up Crashing Into A Vietnamese Nail Salon

CUCUMBER CREEK, Rhode Island – (Satire News) – Little 8-year-old dare devil sensation Billy “Rocket Boy” Pizzquilly was bound and determined to prove that he can get his rocket contraption, which he named “Bitchfire,” to travel at speeds exceeding 12…

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Funny story: Canada's Trudeau emerges from months of self-isolation, wonders if this the year to wear blackface Halloween costume again

Canada's Trudeau emerges from months of self-isolation, wonders if this the year to wear blackface Halloween costume again

After months of self-isolation watching Happy Days reruns and Harry Potter movies on Netflix with his kids, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau reportedly spent most of Wednesday morning asking friends and staffers whether this Halloween was the o…

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Funny story: Halloween: Trick Or Treat To Be Replaced By Track Or Trace

Halloween: Trick Or Treat To Be Replaced By Track Or Trace

Halloween, or All Hallows' Eve, is just around the corner again, but with the deadly Coronavirus still doing its dastardly work, changes to the normal Halloween format have had to be made. Perhaps the most impirtant change is an adaptation of the…

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Funny story: The President Trump Halloween Mask is The Nation’s #1 Seller

The President Trump Halloween Mask is The Nation’s #1 Seller

LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) – The Los Angeles Post-Gazette has just noted that the number one-selling Halloween mask for this Halloween season is the President Donald Trump mask. One of the nation’s leading Halloween mask producers, Masks & A…

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Funny story: Boy is looking forward to Halloween

Boy is looking forward to Halloween

A boy in Harlesden has told his friends that he is really looking forward to Halloween this year. Billy Shrapnel, 12, said he always enjoys this time of the year, because there are two exciting events within a week of each other - Halloween and Gu…

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Funny story: Donald J. Trump Has Decided To Cancel Halloween

Donald J. Trump Has Decided To Cancel Halloween

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Spoof News) The President, after meeting with top advisers, has issued a statement stating that he has decided to cancel this year’s Halloween. Top advisers, Ivanka Trump, Kellyanne Conway, and Eric Trump, all agree that having…

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Funny story: Halloween Cancelled After News That Pumpkins Are Imported From Europe

Halloween Cancelled After News That Pumpkins Are Imported From Europe

There's disappointment amongst children of all ages right across the country this evening, as the news filtered through that Halloween had been cancelled, after it was discovered that pumpkins are imported into the UK from Europe. The UK Food Agen...

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