The Magic of Middleton
If you're British (we know you are if you're reading one of our pieces, there was one Finnish guy that read one and he died! Our work doesn't seem to translate well for international audiences) you will know that the Royal Family are better than you and Kate Middleton is certainly better than you and whatever shit you do. Speculation is rife with how Kate manages to look so young and unflustered e...
Read full storyBacon Bits
Art lovers the world over were overjoyed today as a new painting by Francis Bacon was discovered. The painting had been down the back of a sofa in Sofia and was discovered by the cleaning lady, Sophie Sofia, in the early hours of yesterday morning.
Read full storyArsenal V Koln
Arsenal kicked off their UEFA Eu-Hopeless league campaign with a disastrous 3-1 home win against FC Koln. In a match that will be remembered for its intense crowd violence long after all the gutless players for Arsenal die from having no guts. An...
Read full storySome Teachers Actually Go into Teaching for the Money
Apparently, it's the result of low expectations and outright confusion. "I used to work in Walmart," said one untenured teacher, two years into the profession. "I get at least twice the pay, but I also don't get the 5% discount, so it's a wash. I...
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