
Tom Brady's Cookbook
DATELINE: From Hunger-- If you are a fan of Tom Brady and into nutrition, you are about to lose $200 worth of ugly wallet fat. Yes, Tom's new book on how to eat healthy will strip you of more than a few inflated calories. Already, starving minions...
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Inquiring Trump Wants to Know
DATELINE: THE GRASSY KNOLL IN DALLAS Just when was Lyin' Ted Cruz going to tell the American people that his father used to hang out with Lee Harvey Oswald? Oh, there is photographic evidence of their liaison. It has been clogging up archives for...
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Trump's Fight to Protect American soil - and Personal Space
Washington, D.C. - You heard it here first. The Trump campaign has, yet again, surprised America by proposing a new policy it is naming "The Unalienable Personal Space of Americans", which would criminalize the action of illegal aliens who get too cl...
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VP NEEDED! Donald Trump needs you!
[Donald Trump confers with his chief political advisor Michael Glassner, on the selection of a running mate:] MG (sorting through stack of resumes): What about this republican governor in Maine, LePage? DT: No one's ever heard of Maine. Next choice? MG: How about Silvio Berlusconi? DT: Isn't he in jail? Never mind. He's more outrageous than I am, he'd steal attention away from m...
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Man Forced to Pay Gambling Debt he owes from Parallel Universe
Clearwater, Florida guy, Sammy Dweeberson, spent a pretty uneventful life, up until now. His daily routine consisted of a shower and a nose shave, a breakfast of asparagus cookies, work at a candle manufacturing factory, a stop at a Popeye's on the...
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Bill Cosby is Mystified that NBC Won't Return His Calls
Hollywood, CA Bill Cosby, wondering why he hadn't heard from NBC regarding a new show outline he had sent them. "I don't understand why they haven't answered my inquiries. I only had the No. 1 show for them for ten years and brought the network ba...
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