
Electors elect George Soros President, Henry Kissinger Vice President
USA - Exit polls conducted by MSNBC Monday determined that Trump will not become President after all. Ms. Aroma Pour, veteran reporter with MSNBC, interviewed a Mr. Trey Tour, one of the exiting Electors. According to Tour, the CIA visited the E...
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English Bulldog Rescue Foundation Leaves Golden Retriever Stranded On Freeway
"It was horrific", said one woman, her arms crossed, eyes filled with pain. Just over the knoll loomed a grotesque scene, a heartbreaking tragedy, a dead golden retriever, struck by a vehicle on the interstate. "Just lucky no one else got hurt",...
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Federal Reserve to Introduce New Measures to Further Reduce Inflation
Washington - In testimony before a joint session of Congress, Federal Reserve Chairman Janet Yellen unveiled a new preferred measurement of inflation, developed to further combat the tendency of prices to increase in the U.S. economy. "Historical...
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United sack Jose Mourinho!
The Manchester United board of directors have decided to part way with their recently acquired manager, Jose Mourinho! After 3 successive wins and a run of 10 games unbeaten the board told the parasitical British press that this was an unacceptable s...
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13 Things Never to Say in a Masonic Lodge
1. I'm signing nothing! 2. George Brown, George W. Bush and his dad as well as Henry Kissinger, Barack Obama and J.K. Rowling are all tools, all phonies. 3. Hiram Abiff is an idiotic myth and you should all grow up. 4. Your controllers of the 'upper degrees' are laughing their asses off at the gullibles clinging to the lower rungs. Right? 5. Money is not God. 6. Sex is of no real importance...
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Trump Says Investing in His 2020 Campaign NOW Is A Good Investment for Your Future
Newly-elected President of the United States Donald Trump explained some of the new tax rules to a class of business students touring Trump Tower. "Now is the time for everyone to buy into the future by investing in Trump 2020 Campaign Bonds" spo...
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Trump Calls First Cabinet Meeting; Rumor Passes Among New Cabinet Members That They Have to Bring A Cabinet to the Meeting
Washington, DC Trump called his first Cabinet meeting today. It is good that it was a trial meeting, to get the cabinet members ready for January, when the real Cabinet meetings will start. "It's a good thing for many reasons" said a Trump repres...
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Trump Will Provide Classes at New Trump University for New Cabinet Members to Learn about Their Posts
Washington, DC President-Elect Donald Trump graciously offered "deep-pocket discounts" to all his new Cabinet members to take classes at his New Trump University in order to learn about their new Cabinet posts. "I found it very beneficial" said new Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke. "I learned a lot. Who knew the Interior Department would have anything to do with trees and things like that? I alway...
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Max Headroom Remembers Dating iphone's Siri In College
Los Angeles, CA - Max Headroom never imagined that the girl he once dated in college, a nerdy know-it-all named Siri, would go on to become the voice of Apple's iphone. We sat down with the '80's icon, who was dumbfounded by her success. "I j-j-j...
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