New strapline for UK Lottery unveiled
Camelnot, the bankers for the UK National lottery have today announced a new strapline prior to increasing the number of balls from 49 to 59 in each draw. Their existing strapline, "Play makes it possible", is being changed, based on the new lower...
Read full story"Minions" Movie Full of Subliminal Satanic Messages
Reverend Gerry Fallguy, minister at the Suffering Jesus Christ Baptist church in Atlanta and founder of the Moral Immaturity movement, called reporters to his church last week to announce a startling discovery: "I took my kids to see the "Minions"...
Read full storyMan dies of boredom watching Labour leadership debate
Medical staff in a Manchester hospital struggled to save the life of a middle-aged man who was rushed to the Accident & Emergency ward after watching one too many Labour leadership debates. The unnamed victim was pronounced dead "from utter bored...
Read full storyMajor Scientific Discovery!
While wasting time aimlessly searching the night sky through the telescopic lens of his new Fisher-Price toy assault rifle, a 9 year-old boy accidentally discovered the most important astronomical event ever witnessed in the history of Earth, when he...
Read full story