Clinton-Cheney Affair Shocks Washington
Washingthing, DC - Breaking news suggests that Hillary Clinton and Dick Cheney had a long-term, secret relationship from 1996 through 2000! Randy Pecker, of the Washington Tribune, breaks this story with a promise of more as time goes on. "Dick...
Read full storyQueen's shock as Philip pollinates Flower Show climber
London - The Chelsea Flower Show has been rocked by a royal extramarital shagging caper among the Love Lies Bleeding (Amaranthus caudatus) borders. Early this morning Prince Philip was caught doing something lurid with a large mink-fur paintbrush...
Read full storyMaria Sharapova to start toilet cleaner company
Russian tennis star Maria Sharapova may be more well known for appearing on the cover of the SI Swimsuit edition, but has also gained from this multi million pound endorsement deals via her agent Max Eisenbud. Recently, in an interview with CNN t...
Read full storyA hit with the voters?
How many times have you heard it said? Our political system doesn't work because we only have two realistic options of who to vote for. One is for Eton educated toffs with extravagant duck houses on the lake in their front gardens, the other stands f...
Read full storyWenger Says Some Sing
Arsenal may have to replay their narrow FA Cup win after an investigation into the game found the pink ball used was stupid. It stopped short of concluding the entire football industry was corrupt, tiresome and overpriced as that would have been too...
Read full storyRat's Ass Discovered in Collection Plate at Local Church
REDDING, CA - Police have one suspect in custody after an incident yesterday at Grace U-Save Baptist Church where church officials found what was believed to be a rat's ass in a collection plate following services Sunday morning. Pastor Bubba Bun...
Read full storyPink Floyd to Release Children's Bedtime Book: Dark Side of the Mattress
London - After decades of churning out original, trippy, bizarre and beautiful music and selling kazillions of albums, Pink Floyd have announced they intend to release a children's book this summer. Titled, "Dark Side of the Mattress", the book p...
Read full storyCold Weather Proof of Global Warming
Leading climatologists in Denmark say that the past long cold winter is yet another sign of global warming. Sigge Ennes from the University of Copenhagen says that the trend is now irreversible. "Higher levels of CO2 in the atmosphere from mankind bu...
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