Times Square Rocked by Woman's Act of Walking Up Fully Functioning Escalator
Yesterday morning during rush hour, New Yorkers in Times Square subway station panicked when svelte middle-aged Brooklynite Bernice Shaw walked up the entire 20-plus steps of a fully functioning escalator. Many (literal) bystanders immediately used t...
Read full storyAmericans Debate whether they Get Stuff Done
Dateline: WASHINGTON-Politicians rallied on Get Stuff Done Day, to reassure the American people that their government is in working order. Many boasted of their accomplishments while in office, describing in great detail the stuff in question.
Read full storyPhyllis Schlafly Inadvertently "Outs" Grandson When She Confuses Gay with 'Gay'
Topeka, KS - Phyllis Schlafly, best known for her unwavering extremely conservative political and social views and her opposition to modern feminism, inadvertently 'outed' her homosexual grandson by describing him as gay. During a speech before...
Read full storyDollars or Pounds? Study Shows Weight Proportional to Dollars Spent on Fitness
The fitness industry is a huge marketplace, drawing countless Americans - a full two-thirds of whom are overweight - into spending billions of dollars annually in the hopes of becoming healthier, fitter, or simply less fat. Unfortunately for health-h...
Read full storyUN in Turmoil Over Individuality
New York, NY - The UN today found itself in something of a quandary as a new study by desk'perts from all over the web revealed a startling truth; we're all different! Since 1949, the United Nations has been headlong into creating a single world...
Read full storyRush Limbaugh Not Down With Childrens' Hospitals
On his highly-syndicated national radio show this morning, Rush Limbaugh descended to a new low (for him) by pooh-poohing Childrens' Hospitals in general...and St. Jude Medical Center in particular. Saying it was a "national disgrace" for parents...
Read full storyNasty Brawl at Museum Dedication
After opening remarks offered by ex-NYC Mayor Rudolph Giuliani at the dedication of the National 9/11 Memorial Museum at Ground Zero in Ney York city today, pointed remarks were yelled from the "leaders section" of the museum's gallery. Seemingly tak...
Read full storyWolves Eat Baby They Were Expected To Raise
Reports from Romania are indicating that a pack of wolves did not raise a baby they found abandoned in the woods; but ate it instead. Authorities told reporters that they found a woolen hat, traces of blood and chewed up bones in an area of the wo...
Read full storyPistorius 'assesment' deception'
Doubts have been raised that the given reason the Oscar Pistorius trial was adjourned for at least four weeks to allow Pistorius to be assessed for mental illness is in fact the truth. An investigative Reporter from Pretoria, has revealed this wa...
Read full storyFive world leaders who have torched judges' precious cacti collections speak out
New York - The UN advisory panel on eco destruction has taken depositions from leading politicians following revelations by UK Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg of wanton cactus vandalism. Clegg recently admitted to a 'mad Carlos Castenada moment'...
Read full storyFacebook to Launch 'Babybook' This Summer
A website created by Facebook for parents to create accounts for their new-born babies is to be launched this Summer, to a chorus of "thank fuck" from regular Facebook users. Insufferable parents will be able to create and control their child's p...
Read full storyLebron James Holds American Basketball Fans Hostage Unless Demands Met
Miami - NBA superstar and member of the Miami Heat basketball team, Lebron James, threatened to sit out the next season if LA Clippers owner, Donald Sterling, was not forced to sell the team after recent racist remarks made by Sterling. While he...
Read full storyThe Avocado Terrorist
Lahaina, Maui- In what is shaping up to be one of the most bizarre trials in recent history is set to begin tomorrow on the island of Maui, Hawaii. The man the media has dubbed The Avocado Terrorist will stand trial on felony charges. One Joseph De F...
Read full storyBetty J. Eadie, Author of Embraced by the Light, Has a Nearly Death Experience
BELLEVUE, WA-Betty J. Eadie, author of the NY Times best-seller Embraced by the Light, about her near death experience (NDE) at the age of 31, had a nearly death experience while she was out walking her Miniature Schnauzer, Angelina, last Thursday e...
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