IS jihadis grooming flock of Mongolian ostriches for bomb vest attacks
Syrian Border, Middle East - The renegades' drone program took a sinister twist today after a heavily kitted out ostrich was captured by Iraqi farces complete with bomb vest, surveillance camera and GPS tracker ahead of a covert suicide mission.
Read full storyA Christmas Message from Bono 2014
Hello Hello, Dis year I have been busy saving the world again. My friend and fellow tax exile Sir Bob let me sing on Band Aid again. So that I could start in my new mission to eradicate Ebola. I think I will have this all cured by Christmas, but I will be promoting my other things as well. I now have a rival, Russell Brand, who thinks he can be the saviour of the world. He can't there is on...
Read full storyAuntie Jean Advises Les Brains From Barf Who Has To Decide On A Career
Les Brains Asks: Auntie Jean, I was dropped on my head by the midwife as a baby and consequently cannot make any decisions and have no moral fibre. I can't tell right from wrong , am dishonest and selfish and frequently accidentally wear my jacket inside out. I have an appointment with the Career Adviser at school tomorrow and would like to ask about a career. Which should I choose? Auntie Jea...
Read full storyNo More Republican Senator "Undie Bundling"
President Obama signed an executive order today banning undie bundling by any Republican senator. "Republican senators have had their undies in a bundle for way too long. This practice has caused nothing buy gridlock and has to stop," stated the Pre...
Read full storyInvention Makes Transporter Beams Possible
An invention has made it possible to make a sheep disappear and appear again 2mm away from its original position. The invention only works with live sheep which sometimes have to be killed when it messes up. The invention will be on sale in time f...
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