Guru Merde Wilson
The following story is indebted to Anthony de Mello. "Merde" (real name Jean) Wilson was a knock-kneed youth with freckles that never left him until the day he died. He had red hair and crooked teeth and, despite his six feet in stature, never lost his slim build. His eyesight was none too good either; he wore thick glasses all his life. The boy's parents both died when their car spun off...
Read full storyObese Man Uses GPS To Find His Penis
In a medical and technological first, doctors at Bueller University Hospital have implanted a GPS signaling device in the head of the penis of a severely obese man. The surgery was performed earlier this week. The man's name is being withheld in ord...
Read full storyColoradoans Are Now Even Bigger A**holes Since Start Of Legalized Pot
The wonder mellower-outer cannabis, always said to have a positive, tranquilizing affect on its users, has unfortunately not had such an effect on the normally ego-centered Coloradoans who recently legalized use of it. "Criminy," said Jim Bames, o...
Read full storyObama Teed Off Over Beheading: Alonzo Mourning With President
BILLINGSGATE POST: Martha's Vineyard - White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest today responded to critics who suggested that President Obama should not have played golf immediately after giving an emotional speech condemning the ISIS beheading of J...
Read full storySalafister cleric okays spying on women in the shower
Cairo, Egypt - A Cairo imam has given the nod to members of the ultra-conservative Salafist sect to ogle showering women they might want to marry one day. "Just one of the many aspects of Salafism that makes it attractive to believers," Mustafa K...
Read full story