Frick Fingers Fracking For 4 Hour Erection
BILLINGSGATE POST - Frank Frick of Odessa, Texas, an oil-rig worker, claims that his work as a pipe fitter on a fracking drilling rig caused him an embarrassing 4 hour erection that required him to be air-lifted to an emergency center. Frick, who...
Read full storyMark Sanchez: the Puddy Tatt on Rex Ryan
Many have seen the bearded lady in the circus, but that may not hold a candle to seeing Rex Ryan with a tattoo on his bicep. We are not quite at the level of Colin Kaepernick, with long passages of the Bible being flung like Elmer Gantry at the at...
Read full storyKathy Griffin Sets Mouth on Other TV Newsies
Not content to put her mouth on the crotch of homosexual CNN newsman Anderson Cooper on live TV, Kathy Griffin is vowing to pull similar kinky hijinks on other TV anchors. The shapely, attractive middle-aged publicity hound says she is merely out...
Read full storyPhil Jackson Engaged To Laker Owner's Daughter Jeanie Buss
PLAYA DEL REY, California - Phil Jackson, 67, has won two NBA championship rings as a player with the New York Knicks, six as a coach for the Chicago Bulls, and five as a coach with the Los Angeles Lakers. And now the ex-coach known as the Zen Mas...
Read full storyThe Sign Of Ophiuchus
I had been an astrologer for very many years, diligently generating predictions from the ancient charts for both private clients and national periodicals. For much of that time, however, I had harboured an unspoken suspicion that something was not quite right. It seemed to me that predictions were frequently inaccurate - in fact they were nearly always completely wrong. I had, nevertheless,...
Read full storyGrowing economic hard times have Irish little people community scared for their lives, gold
Many members of Ireland's little people community are scared tonight. There has been a dramatic and sudden rise of kidnapping amongst the little people community in Ireland during these economic hard times. Moody's Investors Service on Tuesday dow...
Read full storyBritain to become a third world country
Brussels MEPs will soon be voting on whether or not to downgrade Britain's status from a fully paid up member of the European Union and instead have them sidelined as 'one of those countries we don't really like, such as Poland and Greece'. This w...
Read full storyWeddings have become too expensive
With the economy in the state that it is in, the rising cost of weddings has become something that many men are deciding against tying the knot. "It costs several thousand quid," said Harry Balls, a mathematics lecturer from Sheffield University,...
Read full storySurgeons accidentally give transplant patient "evil hand"
There was embarrassment at a specialist hospital in Bradford today when it was revealed that following a 6 hour operation to give patient Robert Handy a new hand, surgeons had accidentally given him the hand of a criminal. Mr. Handy lost his left...
Read full storyLong Live King Belichick!
Josh McDaniels has been anointed. It is not quite the River Jordan, but the media has dunked Josh into the Charles River to indicate that a greater one will follow Bill Belichick. Yes, the aimless speculation has been spurred by one particularly b...
Read full storyPay to Stay plan for British Jails
Back in the 1850's Charles Dickens wrote an editorial about a man who had been wrongly arrested for robbery. The real criminal was arrested and later convicted, he served 5 years in Prison. The man who was wrongly arrested spent 40 years in jail. The...
Read full storyNASCAR'S Danica Patrick Denies The Derek Hough Rumors
AMARILLO, Texas - NASCAR race driver Danica Patrick was in the Texas panhandle visiting one of her cousins identified as Aspen Loopkinlocker. Recent reports have stated that Danica's marriage has hit a big oil spill and her #10 race car is spinnin...
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