Abramoff says Bush infiltrated UN with satanists
Washington DC - (Associated Mess): Lawyers acting for convicted Washington lobbyist Jack Abramoff have backed up the UN's Deputy Secretary General Mark Malloch Brown's assertion this morning that President George Bush was a KGB hitman who i...
Read full storyPresident Bush Gets al-Zarqawi's Head
WASHINGTON DC (AP) The still warm head of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi was put on a plane to Andrews Air Force Base just hours after US forces in Iraq killed the al-Qeada terrorist. President Bush interrupted his morning snooze to talk to reporters. "They te...
Read full storyMarines Squeal Over the Use of Wimpy Ammunition
Baghdad, Iraq (ANP) - For over thirty years the United States Marines had relied on wussy ammunition to defeat America's enemies. But after a series of fiascos in Iraq where Marines have used up to ten rounds in a single incident to kill a blind ins...
Read full storyChickens Face Holocaust
Much of the world has been alarmed over the growing threat of the Bird Flu over the past year. The virus is expected to mutate and spread between people within a couple years. In preparation for this, many nations have instituted a system of contro...
Read full storyTen Tom Tourists Choose Tennessee
Memorial Day in the Smokies means traffic jams in both Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg, favored holiday destinations for many families in the Southeast. Cars and trucks crawl up and down the Parkway close to Dollywood and the main street in front of Rip...
Read full storyHorizon Dairy "Stumped" by Cow Protest
Denver, CO - Horizon Dairy, a subsidiary of Dean Foods, announced today that they were stumped by the behavior of many of their dairy cows. The cows, which are usually kept in "Organic Feed-Lots" broke out of their confinement and romped in nearby g...
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