Trump threatens to strip Ms USA
Trump Tower, NY - (Ass Mess): Notorious ageing rug-man and diehard aficionado of the bald-patch slick-over Donald Trump has vowed in public to strip Ms USA.
Read full storySnoop Dogg Overdoses on Liquid Smoke
Grammy winner Mary J Blige, last person to see Snoop Dogg upright and talking told police, "All we were doing was a little smoke you know, I passed the bottle to Snoop then I went NO Snoop NOOO don't drink the whole BOTTLE but he di...
Read full storyNoel Sacked Amid Claims Of Evil Plotting
News tonight of the sensational sacking of Noel Edmonds from channel 4's hit show Deal or no Deal.
Read full storyWhore on Terra: Bush withdrawal method slammed as mercenary position
Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Knowing when to pull out and when to keep DeLaying gratification are seminal leadership skills that any Commander in Chief ignores at his peril. And in DC last night the mood was sombre as Presidential aides sought to que...
Read full storyWas the Medal of Freedom Awarded to a Presidential Biographer Really Free?
Author and historian David McCullough has been awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, but many people are wondering at what price.
Read full storyUS Navy Submarine Mounted By Giant Sperm Whale
Seamen of the USS Wyoming, a US Navy fast attack submarine stationed off the coast of Central American, had a rough jolt this morning after a gigantic sperm whale, in a gross case of mistaken identity, tried to mount the submarine and one of it's...
Read full storyTom Cruise to sue clinic for leg extension op blunder
It was made official today that Academy Award winner Tom Cruise is to sue chique London cosmetic surgery clinic "Make Me Look Human Ltd." for £40m after bungling his leg extension operation, turning him from a 5 ft 4 in short arse into a 6...
Read full storyVictoria's Secret sells naughty celebrity panties
Hollywood, Victoria's Secret announced today the company will be releasing a new line of celebrity inspired panties called, "Paparazzi".
Read full storyNaked Britney Spears As Navy Finds Remains of Santa's Reindeer; "Donder Party" Ate Own Dead
NOME, AK, June 25, 2013, Reuters - Hopes faded for toy baron Nicholas Klaus and his legendary sheltered workshop yesterday after a U.S. Navy rescue team found the remains of his eight tiny reindeer on an ice floe 700 miles northeast of Point Barrow,...
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