I purchased this book because I had a rather annoying Mockingbird nesting in a tree in my garden. He continually berates my family and is often quite rude. I had tried many times to kill it in the past and failed. I had tried ACME dynamite, a giant anvil, tying it to railroad tracks and shooting at it with a slingshot. Just like Roadrunner in the carton, it survived everything. So I bought...
This book works.....basically I followed all the instructions laid down in this manual and within three weeks I had not only imprisoned our noisy neighbor Mr Alex Right, but had cut him open, removed his heart and sent him on his way. Now he is as quiet as can be and we never hear a word from him, however the awful odor of rotting flesh that emits from his garage (where we let him rest several...
At first I thought this was the title of Ozzie Osborne's new CD. Well what can you write about this book that has not already been said. I will try. I would have liked to have seen more references to Star Wars in this book, I doubt anyone has said that have they? Okay, well, I read it, I kind of thought it was okay but without the hype this book would not have done as well and there ar...
I read this book with my daughter, I of course have to give this book a good review, however, and as a side note, please don't let your kids, after reading this book, insist on placing a hat on their own cat. Sammy got very upset when my 5 year old insisted he wear a hat, he was desperately trying to get it off his head. My daughter then got annoyed with him because he wouldn't speak - nor...
The title of this book is VERY misleading. Scotland has ALREADY been discovered.....so if you are buying this book hoping to be the first person to discover Scotland you will be very disappointed. It is a functioning third world country populated by ginger haired people and men dressed in skirts. The women all have beards and they deep fry EVERYTHING. There may well be parts of Scotland yet un...
I am sure there are better ways of getting to see your kids than dressing up and pretending to be a woman! Personally I see the sub text in this book - he had urges, certain uncontrollable urges to dress as a woman. Which is fine. Live and let live...but don't say it was for the kids....come on....please, he liked the feel of nylon on his legs, the freedom that a frock gives you, the fantastic...
Man and Boy was THANK GOD not what I thought it was. The deceptive title and cover led me to believe that this was the story of an imaginary relationship between a 55 year old carpenter named, for example Colin Hutchinson, who forms an unlikely attraction to an 18 year old extremely handsome boy named, for example, Alan Twat. In the book I was imagining Hutchinson pursues Alan and tries to...
This book is about these kids who somehow get involved with Mork from Mork and Mindy! There are a lot of things that happen, including a great scene where Mork PRETENDS he isn't actually Mork at all! Which was very confusing. I recommend my next book, MONOPOLY, if you liked this book. What happens is that these kids are suddenly plunged into the the game and become real estate moguls, dema...
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs Okay, I have no problem with this book, in fact I love it but, I think the proper term, and politically correct way of referring to dwarfs is midgets. So, please, could you get with the 21st Century and stop offending little people and retitle this book? I expect that there are thousands of midgets who totally offended to be regarded as dwarfs. I nearly thr...
Looking For Alaska by John Green Good book, but save a lot of time by just looking at a map. Alaska is somewhere near Canada. I hear it is a fantastic country, though they never win medals at the Olympics but, as far as I know, Alaska is a friendly country and never been at war with anyone. So if you are really looking for Alaska head towards Canada and then go east. I have devised a new ra...
Exodus by Leon Uris I have to admit I was a little confused about this book. About 96% of the way in I was enjoying it immensely but then realized it bears no resemblance to the movie version. There were no spinning heads, no priests, no girls possessed by demons and the Exodus of the title didn't make an appearance once. It just goes to show how Hollywood can totally misinterpret things...
Les Misérables - by Victor Hugo. Okay, if you can over the fact that this version is not a musical and there is no singing or songs in the book then it is actually not bad. To compensate I hummed songs from the original stage version to myself continually while reading the book. Obviously this did upset some people, my fellow movie goers, as, for some unfathomable reason I was reading thi...
I read this book in the hope I could maybe teach MY wife to be a bit more reliable. It is absolutely no fun at all to come home from a hard days work and realize that your wife, who has been home all day, has NOT made dinner. Instead she has spent the day looking after Enrique the pool boy, who apparently felt faint, and had to spend the whole day in bed, my bed, with my wife - who was also feelin...
It took me 3 days to read this book but at then of the day I really had no idea what it was about, who the characters were nor did I get the plot. Probably because it was written in French and I don't understand French one bit. "C'est la vie" (Whatever that means. I would suggest, to all would be authors, irrelevant of your country of origin, the language you speak or anything else, that, y...
I loved this book and it had special meaning for me. Last week I flew from New York to Hong Kong and my luggage got lost. Three days later my suitcase turned up but I found out that my bag had been to Amsterdam, Paris, Sydney, Delhi and Rio! I had only packed boxer shorts, socks and a few T-Shirts. So my "pants" had indeed become travelling pants, they had traveled the world! So, I though...
Captain Nemo: 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea and the Mysterious Island Yet another example of how Hollywood can totally misinterpret classic novels. I read this book while in hospital, recuperating after an unsuccessful operation to cure my ignorance and stupidity. That though, is besides the point and a totally another story. Anyway, after reading the book I rented the movie and oh, how an...
HONG KONG - The republic of China, in its neverending quest to find ways to save money, has just hit upon an excellent idea. They have decided that they will stop printing Chinese phone books in order to save billions of dollars a year. A repre...
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