Silicon Valley USA: Facebook went off line for 20 minutes last night, causing the asteroid Armageddon13 to change course for earth. Military scientists have known Armageddon 13 to pose a serious threat to earth for 17 years. Facebook was conceive...
Another Friday the 13th came and went without incident. It's as if the Universe doesn't take itself seriously anymore. Mars can run retrograde and Saturn can be humping Venus (relatively speaking of course) and still life goes on without so much as a blip. Until now. Quietly staying behind in the shadows was the bad news of the century waiting its turn to slap the face of every serious beer guz...
Several astronomers are coming right out and telling people to be extra careful this Friday the 13th due to the fact that in addition to the 13th falling on a Friday this month, another more sinister event will be happening in the skies that night-a...
Dear Hank, I have a serious issue that needs addressed. I'm a conservative, belong to the NRA and have just finished my bunker cause we all know what's coming in 2012. My damn wife wants to decorate the damn thing and take down all my desert storm pictures. We will be sharing the space with our son who is two right now and our cat Sherman, but I can't give up my plaid couch and plasma T.V. We'r...
Satan is said to be madder than hell at his minions this week after he learned that more than one, and possibly as many as eight Anti-Christs have been unleashed upon the Earth during the past century. Harry Scarem, a demonologist from California...
Before you all piss your pants with worry and declare your love to your next door neighbour before its all over, NASA are simply referring to our civilisation from an electrical prospective! Yes, those boffins in the US enjoy issuing these types...
Sticks and Stones Will Break my Bones, but Misdemeanor Assault Victims Will Sue Me. - Be true to your school! Former Texas Longhorn and current Tenessee Titans gunslinger Vince Young allegedly got P.O. 'ed at a Dallas titty bar when a fellow lap danc...
Following the Attacks of September 11th, 2001, Professor Lawrence Shannon expected the Earth's geopolitical situation to rapidly spiral out of control. He, like many other realists grounded in the intellectual world, never expected to see the year 2...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, was this morning convalescing after a terrifying evening spent watching The History Channel. Shuttlecock, not usually easily convinced by hysterical mumbo-jumbo had to hide behind the sofa after watching a TV show ab...
Iceland are being accused of using weapons of mass disruption after a gigantic cloud of volcanic ash made its way across from Iceland. President Obama is watching the situation closely as he might decide to take action against Iceland, for using a we...
Mad Micky Morrison the former scientist who is as mad as a hatter claimed today that the earthquake in China, and the Volcanic eruption in Iceland are caused by the fact that Planet X is now even closer to earth which is going to increase the number...
The well known "World And Neptune Kind Earth Society" (WANKERS) met today to discuss the 'always in the news' story prophesizing the end of the World. Now, unlike many of the members of the ever growing all-knowing society "Usually Sane" (US)the W...
Terrified 'believers' are calling for a recall of ALL TRUMPETS since hearing about Ron Weinland's prophecy. Seven Trumpets are to be heard heralding the end of the world. Too late for the first one, which apparently was sounded in 2008. I didn't...
NASA have ordered all staff to shut up about planet X which is allegedly heading closer to earth causing more and more Earthquakes and Tsunamis. The last time Planet X was mentioned in any news was just after Xmas day when Planet X was visible on...
There are billions of Parallel Universes with billions of copies of you living different lives because of different choices made and different choices made by others in the other parallel universes. To put it simply imagine a powerful radio that you can tune into lots of different stations. While you are tuned into Radio one for example there are thousands of other radio stations still broadca...
Reknowned astrophysicist Ferbert T. Weedledom and Nubile Prize winning environmentalist Felicia T. Weedledee announced publication of their research paper entitled, "A Baker's Guide to Planetary Acoustics," in which they assert that the cumulative effect of acoustical energy generated by noise-producing events, in combination with electromagnetism and gravitational influences, are responsible for...
BEJING China - Upon his arrival in China this evening, according to my source Noyen Tubuyca, Obambi declared that the US Treasury would issue its own currency independent of the Federal Reserve, the country of China, and the Bilberberg cabal. The...
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