LONDON - Less than one month ago Kate Middleton expressed to one of her closet friends Winnie Figgyfurst, 36, that she was starting to have second thoughts about the Royal Wedding. Figgyfurst confided to Ta Ta For Now News that Kate had literally...
LONDON - The soon-to-be wed Prince William recently attended a surprise birthday party for one of his childhood friends Wycliffe Burgershire at Wycliffe's home in Upper Tooting. Wycliffe is the long time friend who first taught William all about f...
London - The mile-long turd flotilla will lead the procession commemorating the Rowlingesque fairy tale of the Queen's 60-year reign. The waterborne pageant announced today will be headed by a carnival float of Euro-septic tank pathogens including...
Anglesey - Clips from the five minute aerial skirmish were posted on the Royal YouBoob! site today as the Queen visited RAF Valley in Wales. The footage shows RAF search and rescue pilot Prince William singlehandedly shooting down an ominous mothe...
London - The tit-for-tat revenge plot harks back to a 1996 MI6 spoof assassination scam, the former Libyan foreign minister told debriefers today. This was to rub out Muammar Gaddafi and replace him with another of the Queen's nasty little bastard...
LONDON - Oprah Winfrey the richest woman in the United States was recently invited by Queen Elizabeth to attend a dinner at Buckingham Palace in honor of legendary rhythm and blues artist Smokey Robinson, lead singer with one of Motown's greatest groups Smokey Robinson and The Miracles. The music legend who was born William Robinson, Jr., in Detroit has been performing for 55 years. And in that...
Glasgow - A Scottish Environment Agency canteen sausage roll sent the geiger counter ballistic this afternoon prompting an immediate phone call to Buckingham Palace. "We advise an immediate change of pantiliner, Ma'am," the Government's chief scie...
LONDON - Mr. and Mrs. Russell Brand have just celebrated their five month marriage and some individuals who are close to the two stars say that to use an old Cleveland cliché, 'the honeymoon is over.' One unnamed friend of the couple, who spoke on...
Los Angeles - A chilling Hollywood prophecy describing the world's greatest actresses 'in karmic freefall all the way to the crem' has seen Zsa Zsa Gabor hospitalised for shock. The 94 year-old diva was first told of the prediction by Nancy Reagan...
The newest Royal Wedding commemorative mug now has photos of Justin Bieber and Lady Gagger's photos on. Yes....LADY GAGGER! When will this madness end? Everyone and their mother-in-law are jumping on the bandwagon hoping to make a quick buck or...
Dublin - "About time she settled her bloody bar tab," disgusted Temple Bar publican John Stokes said today as dozens of defiant Dublin innkeepers joined his ban on the Queen. Stokes was speaking to reporters after being ordered by licensing magist...
Gloucs - A mixed bet accumulator stands to scoop one lucky punter £1m if the Queen drops dead on St Patrick's Day. Cheltenham racegoer Dave Potts got odds of 25-1 for HM popping her clogs tomorrow after a multiple events wager accumulated £40,000...
LONDON - With the Royal Wedding date fast approaching Queen Elizabeth is really starting to show her royal majestic claws so to speak. Tickety Boo News is reporting that her Highness was recently sitting in one of the many 'sitting rooms' located...
Royal Wedding watchers, Prince William and even Her Royal Highness Majesty Ma'am the Queen were delighted to hear that the soon to be royal addition to the family, Kate Middleton, has come out of the closet. The Duke of Edinburgh, never one to hid...
LONDON - In a stunningly unbelievable revelation that could possibly have world wide repercussions Kate Middleton, the fiancee of Prince William has confided to an extremely close friend that she is beginning to have second thoughts about getting mar...
London - The Duke of York has had to cancel a 'Big Bang: UK Young Scientists Fair' trip this Friday over 'unfortunate connotations'. The Max Mosley-lookalike freeloader has been told he'll have to keep those adolf-esecent Big Bang theories to hims...
Royal shock machines Sorry, Doshless of York, and Andrew, Duke of Hopeless, are set to be exiled as soon as an unsuitable country can be found to accept them. But apparently even the worst places on earth have their limits. Given her fondness f...
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