Well, you're off to college. The hometown where you grew up is a long ways away; things feel strange, but you're getting by. Do you know why? You're a stud; you're a player. Sometimes at the campus parties you get so drunk that you forget the first name of your Dad and even your younger brother's nickname. I know how it is, I've been there, but you have to think through all this. Get hold of y...
NEW YORK CITY - Sporting Chance Magazine is reporting that disgraced former Rutgers University basketball coach Mike Rice has received so much hate mail, text messages, phone calls, tweets, and emails that he is in a state of depression. Sherwood...
NEW YORK CITY - Rutgers basketball coach Mike Rice has just been fired and rightly so. The poor excuse for an adult was videotaped abusing his players by pushing them, shoving them, hitting them, kicking them, and even tossing basketballs at them...
DENVER - University patrol officers file for unemployment throughout Colorado just a few months after the state effectively passed ballot initiatives legalizing, taxing, and regulating recreational marijuana use. After Amendment 64 had passed, un...
CHICAGO - Recent studies on the mechanics of texting have shown that overdoing it can lead to some serious complications. Professor Verdana Mindy Tenditucker, head of the Anatomical Department at Cottonball State University in Tuscaloosa, Alabama,...
PROVINCETOWN, Massachusetts - The New England Department of Fishing has just issued a statement dealing with the East Coast fishing industry. NED of F Assistant Director of Operations Blumenthal H. Persimmon, 49, has said that according to predict...
Salisbury, MD - Local roommate Mike Harron "is really having trouble believing the guy dodged all those fucking shots." The Salisbury University junior, "honestly cannot believe that just fucking happened." "He was on the ground in last stand, wha...
MIAMI, OH--Replete with its multiple posters of Michael Jordan and Spud Webb, Super Nintendo, GoldStar TV and vinyl copy of Dr. Dre's The Chronic, Miami University sophomore Nick Mostey indisputably has the coolest dorm room on campus were it the yea...
ANN ARBOR, MI--Brian Pollack, a freshman at the University of Michigan, announced today that he was lifting his self-imposed ban on masturbating in the room he shares with fellow freshman Eric Edwards. Sources have confirmed that Pollack's new-found...
HARFOLD, Vt. - Harfold State College released a study this week, the results of which may have a profound effect on the way Americans view life. The vast majority or 90.9% of people surveyed, or 10 of 11 kids at Harfold Fish & Chips, reveal a...
When Sharon Williams, a sophomore at Northeastern University in Boston, Massachusetts, noticed that none of her Facebook "friends" ever called her, contacted her outside the website, or expressed any interest in her personal life beyond an occasional...
College is much better than real life. If I could pass on any advice, it would be to never graduate…. Stay in school FOREVER. In the spirit of making my life more difficult than necessary, I entered the work force before my official due date. I wish (as in I am begging you dear seniors) you would only do the opposite. With that being said, I have one piece of advice for you. Fail a final, loos...
DURANGO, Colorado - Students at Durango Junior College were jumping up and down with joy when they learned that a state judge had issued a ruling that students at Colorado colleges and universities will now be allowed to carry handguns on campus.
KIMJONG, IL (CWTSN) -- Butch Falfalan, a BS Marine Exploration freshman student of Conglom-o College allegedly walked out from his English class because he had enough of his teacher's "anti-soldier" examples on the lessons. In a lesson about an ar...
HARFOLD, Vt. - In a recent study released by Harfold State College, nine of out 10 college males answered, "NOT!" when asked if the Mona Lisa was hot. The survey was conducted last Friday night in Nate Horner's dorm room where he and nine of his f...
Controversial footballer, Mario Balotelli, has been at it again. It appears that he popped into a Manchester sixth form college to use their toilet. Catholic Sixth Form College, The College of the Holy Water, have identified the toilet in question an...
UNIVERSITY PARK, Pennsylvania - In a collegiate move that has surprised 91 percent of the Penn State faculty and 93 percent of the Penn State student body, school administrators have moved to change the university's name. Penn State spokesperson...
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