A new Fox News poll out today shows African American Mormons would have likely voted for Presidential candidate Mitt Romney in large numbers, if only there were any Black Mormons. Romney, reached during a vacation stop in Asheville North Carolina...
Following President Obama's victorious bid for a second term in the White House, his nemesis Donald Trump has launched a scathing attack against him and democracy on Twitter. Trump, a US property mogul and internationally renowned idiot, who suppo...
BOSTON - Mitt Romney was thoroughly beaten by President Barack Obama. The former governor of Massachusetts wasted no time in finding excuses as to why he lost the election. Romney stated that there were lots of reasons why he lost. He said tha...
Four more years of President Obama. That's what the American people have decided. After a close race Obama came out on top beating his challenger Mitt Romney. While some are delighted with the result, others are devastated. Fox News' chief o...
WASHINGTON - As America goes to the polls today a leading image consultant says the President Barack Obama will become more white if re-elected to the White House. Obama is slightly ahead of Republican Mitt Romney in most polls and is expected to...
WASHINGTON, D.C.--In an unprecedented move, President Obama suspended his campaign today to address the nation from the White House, where he forcefully and unequivocally stated that Mitt Romney's Mormon faith should prohibit him from ever serving as...
WASHINGTON, DC (ABSNN) - The United States of America is now under the military control of Muppets from the Children's Television Workshop. Muppet Military Command (MMC) first occupied the Pentagon and took firm control over all US military forces i...
TOLEDO, Ohio - Most of the political media realizes that the GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney talks a lot about the middle class and about poor people but he really does not know very many people in either group. Political Salad Bar Magazine...
In a surprise announcement that even his staff was not aware of, Mitt Romney called a press conference this morning to make a dramatic proposal regarding the nation's defense. Romney: "There is nothing in our government today that cannot be done b...
Hurricane Sandy Takes Gigantic Shit On US East Coast and It's All Your Fault. 1) Browbeating Jersey Shore cast members and Jersey Mike's via Twitter isn't the same as actually helping fellow New Jerseyans. 2) I wish I was as motivated to be a community advocate and humanitarian even if there weren't flattened houses in my neighborhood. That's a character defect I intend to rectify. 3)...
HARFOLD, Vt. - Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, after being lambasted by the general managers of Chrysler and General Motors for bad-mouthing the efforts in of President Obama in the car industry, has purportedly found a dealership in u...
Washington - It's bad news for the Romney Campaign as millions of undecided American voters head for the polls under the influence of a rare astrological aspect on the day of the US presidential election. Tuesday sees Mercury, planet of communicat...
ST. BARTS, West Indies - Former speaker of the house Newt Gingrich and third wife Callista were down in the Caribbean relaxing and getting away from the tons and tons of political campaign ads. According to a highly placed source with Gingrich's p...
ANCHORAGE, Alaska - Mitt Romney flew up to Alaska in an effort to try and convince the people of the 49th state that they should vote for him even though there really aren't that many millionaires in the Iceberg State. He was met at The Nanook of...
NAUGATUCK, Connecticut - Mitt Romney flew to Naugatuck to visit one of his fellow multi-millionaire friends Simon P. Figgincow, 59. Figgincow is the individual who is alleged to have told Romney not to show his income tax returns from 2007 to 2010...
CORCORAN, California - The most infamous inmate in the history of Corcoran State Prison, Charles Manson, has been denied parole for the 12th time. Manson, who is now 77, was convicted for his role in the Sharon Tate murders of 1969. He was rece...
Like the Taliban promise of 72 virgins to suicide bombers, former Massachusetts Governor Willard Mitt Romney emphatically denied that he promised male voters 72 virgins if they would vote for his ticket. He also denied that he added a caveat to the p...
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