Los Angeles, California - (Ass Mess): Lawyers acting for peroxide socialite Paris Hilton have slammed LA Judge Michael T Sauer's insistence that Paris Hilton wears panties for the 45 days' duration of her prison sentence as 'cruel and un...
California - (Ass Mess): Peroxide bimbette Paris Hilton has spoken for the first time about her fears regarding the fate of her unique $25,000 hair extensions "which will surely perish" among the nit-infested and cockroach-sprawling confine...
Paris Hilton, the air-headed heiress, was recently sentenced to 45 days prison for driving while in possession of a skinny ass. Now TV studios are fighting each other to get coverage of her stretch in jail.
Leading celebrity and socialite Miss Paris Hilton has been jailed for 45 days after, in the judges opinion, she refused to observe the conditions of her probation for a drink-driving conviction. Miss Hilton was foun...
Paris Hilton arrived late for a Los Angeles court date today, but claimed that keeping the judge and attorney's waiting was not her fault. "Have you seen the new shoes at Gucci? I mean, they expect me to be in some courtroom when they are...
Paparazzi all over the world today claimed that crotch-shots are drying up in every country. One hack photographer commented, "A couple of months ago you couldn't take a picture without snapping something inadvertently flapping in the breeze...
Hollywood - (Ass Mess): Official: Pantyless party girls have got right up Bruce Willis's nose. But the Die Hard star is fighting back and vowing to Go Commando to redeem those PR ratings that he says he's been robbed of by 'foxy little c...
A new statue of Paris Hilton has been unveiled at a New York museum. In the statue, a naked Paris Hilton is laid out on a table with her inards exposed. The golden statue wears a tiara and her dog is on top of her, also in a tiara. The organs are...
Typically blank-eyed heiress Paris Hilton was visibly upset today during a press interview in which she critisized top designer Anya Hindmarsh over her "insulting" designer bag for Sainsbury's Supermarkets.
LOS ANGELES COUNTY JAIL, CALIFORNIA-- (ARCHITECTURAL DIGEST) After being warned countless times, the law has reached the end of its' rope. The Honorable Traffic Court Judge E.Z. Street, threw the book and sentenced Paris, Hilton...
It's no secret that Quentin Tarantino enjoys the shock factor in his movies, that all important car crashy scene where you know you should be looking away but you just have to look, think Michael Madsen giving someone a Van Gogh and you get the p...
Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, and Lindsay Lohan are not happy. Lindsay, famous for her multiple nip-slips, is furious. Paris, famous for her sex tapes and wild lifestyle, is angry. Britney, famous for pictures of her exiting a limo without panties...
It's been several weeks since lonely internet surfer, Jack Kilby, announced to the world that he didn't think 'One Night in Paris' was very good.
A few weeks ago I said that a JLA movie was coming out with a few hot actresses (not Paris Hilton!). It was cancelled by the worried mothers because the movie was rated G.
Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie will be camp counselors at a camp for teenage girls in their next incarnation of The Simple Life. In it, they will work with young teens and tweens in the mountains to share the fountain of their knowledge. Unlike reg...
Due to public demand, George Bush (With Bill Clinton's permission and blessing) has now insisted that the "no panties" bill be passed for actresses (and some actors) in order to keep their celebrity status.
Farting! letting rip! Squeezing the cheese! These are all different ways to describe passing wind, a totally natural but sometimes embarrassing bodily function that has been the butt of jokes the world over. Well, it seems no more as John Paul Gaulti...
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