After a damming report, by boffins at Southampton University, which stated that a mixture of commonly used food colourings could cause hyperactivity in children, drug users have cleared supermarket shelves of all leading confectionery products.
Amy Winehouse, the troubled songstress, has surprised the pop world after announcing details of her new single, which is a cover of an old musical favourite.
Sydney, Austalia - (Ass Mess): Following earlier reports this week that pussy is high up on Australians' menu preferences these days a Sydney newspaper has featured a story about a cocaine-crazed pussy that survived its owners' long lost week...
The Hague, Netherlands - (Ass Mess & Uterus): The Queen Mum started it, followed by the Puppet Monarch Old Fatty Mountbatten herself, then Princess Margaret, Princess Anne and finally Diana, Princess of Wales.
The police have continued to make arrests throughout northern England as police attempt to crackdown on the cheese dealing trade.
The conservative leader has admitted that he took drugs whilst at Eaton. In his auto-biography he revealed that while at Eaton he, on more than one occasion, eaten some Cathedral City, or done a bit of Red Leicester.
Washington D.C. (IP) - Washington DC has been declared off limits to the growing practice of drug testing entire cities by macro testing for the contents of drug residues in the cities sewer systems.
Mexico City, Mexico (IP) - A submarine full of drugs was busted off of the coast of Guatemala today. The drug sub was enroute to the United States and its point of origin was Columbia.
In a joint press release earlier this week, the American Pharmaceutical Association (APhA) and the American Psychiatirc Association (APA) announced that they are joining forces to create a new group to advance the interests of psychiatrists who want...
Washington (IP) - The White House this morning announced that a new program has been initiated that will provide free prescriptions to all members of Congress, the Supreme Court, and to members of the public whose net worth is at least $10 million in...
A massive drug deal was hindered yesterday by none other than a great white shark.
Picabo, Idaho (The Daily Spud) - Move over, methamphetamine epidemic. The latest craze is frighteningly more common and three times as addictive.
CAPE CORAL, Florida (Heewack News Network) -- Dozens of rock stars lined up outside the Pubix supermarket here after the chain announced that it would provide free quantities of certain drugs.
United Nations drug officials say the new Afghan Government has largely failed in its efforts to eradicate the opium poppy crop.
Paralytic Pictures announced today that they will be producing a remake of their classic picture, Lost Weekend.
A survey is published today that tells us that the risk of developing mental health problems is increased by 40% after just one smoke of cannabis.
Houston, Texas (IP) - NASA has issued flasks and bongs to all of its astronauts complete with NASA logos on the side of each. Also available are adult diapers with the NASA logo. Another item they are making available are NASA rolling papers with t...
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