Just over 18 months ago, I was paid a visit from a double-glazing salesman who persuaded me to buy some windows from his company. After listening to him for a good hour explaining the virtues of the windows and how good they were at retaining heat and keep out noise; I do remember that his last words were: "these windows are so good that they will pay for themselves within a year!" Needless to...
Just behind their beta release of Windows 7, which is aimed at a mobile computing market, Microsoft has announced their most ambitious operating system yet, codenamed "Gotchanow," a word that is apparently based on the Native American term meaning, "...
The new version of Microsoft Windows, Windows 7, has escaped rather than waiting to be voluntarily released by the company. The new Windows, which has been devised solely to part frustrated Windows users from their money, is actually just Vista wi...
Geneva: The Big Bang machine stopped working today after it developed the Blue Screen of Death. Said Cerns director Professor Wolfgang "Yes we can confirm the Hadron Collider stopped today due to the blue screen of death, a common fault in windows...
Historical texts have proven that Ukulele player George Formby was not a good window cleaner. Contemporary reports from the time revealed that the comedy maverick was often tardy, left his ladders all over the place, used the same water for days,...
Microsoft founder and milker, Bill Gates, today announced that his company was raising the price of Windows XP to $100.
Microsoft customer, Curt N Rodde was told yesterday to 'pull himself together' when he fell ill and suffered mental anguish having managed to contact a human being at Microsoft when he had a problem with his Windows XP.
In a not-totally unexpected move, Microsoft reversed the roles of Windows Vista and XP. The spokesman for Microsoft said, "Vista is on the way out and XP is on the way in."...
Bik Pu, 37, a single South Korean man who worked in a Seoul office apparently committed suicide over the loss of "Clippy."...
Windows Vista---worth the money? Well, it definitely is if you're like me---well-connected to a very high-placed sales rep at PC Magazine who sold me his copy for $35 and my DVD of Leprechaun, which, friends and neighbors, I've had for so long that he's forgotten IT'S ACTUALLY HIS (SCORE!!) But predictably, Bill Gates's newest offering is full of problems. Simply right...
I'm moving to the U.K. In Norwich, several insurance claims have made news by declaring that numerous people are at the mercy of the animal kingdom: deer smashing kitchen windows, horses chewing cars, etc. My favorite is the woman who filed an insurance claim because her beloved hamster became so fraught with the idea of visiting the vet that he chewed through her handbag. It goes to show you...
Jan Sorhlbaad is no ordinary Swedish grandfather. From first appearances, his modest (albeit damp) home and family are what you might expect. However shocking reports arrived today that could bring down the very fabric of society - yes, Microsoft its...
It was a rather cloudy day. As the rain lashed the windows, Britney sat in her living room consulting an outdated weather forecast. Having decided to make most of the "clear, sunny day", she committed to embarking upon a "Tour de la France."...
Overview: If your computer powers in okay, but the Windows XP operating system won't kick gates and vista properly, you have some troubleshooting ahead of you. Here's a look at the likely culprits and what you can do to fix the kicking problem.
A recent study has proven that all experts think Linux is better than Windows and Mac OS.
[Gates Land] - Windows Vista has hit the market, but Microsoft may hit the dirt. Apple has told it's consumers that current iPod devices and software will not be compatible with Vista for some time. Now that might not sound like a big deal, but...
In a surprise move, God, who claims to have created a 3D world on the fifth or sixth day thousands of years ago, is going to sue Microsoft over use of 3D panes. The move is seen by many to be God's last chance against Bi...
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