Now the middle of classes were middler than most They had oodles of things on which they could boast. They had cars, and houses, and TVs and more They were boasting and boasting of goodies galore. Til one day the bottom all dropped out from under The middle of classes was torn quite asunder. The greed of the 1% people with money Decided to steal all the milk and the honey. There'd be n...
You'd better watch out, you'd better not cry, the economic crisis currently gripping Greece and Italy has spread North, far North to the home of Father Christmas. Massive wage cuts have caused unrest across the winter wonderland with industrial ac...
Euro leaders are to decide if they should cancel Christmas or not. The state of the economy looks like it may be a yes. "The Italian Prime Minister always buys the Greek Prime Minister a Christmas present and so the other way round but this year i...
"A pox on their house," was the reaction of Mr. Claus when he found out he wouldn't be hired by one Midwestern town in the U. S. this year. He controlled his language in consideration of Mrs. Claus, who was standing at his side when he got the news.
Tough new regulations from Brussels coming in today aren't only to do with toy safety. They also mean that from now on it will be illegal to wrap up Christmas presents with paper. "Paper cuts can be very serious," explained a EU spokesperson. "Chi...
If you were just thinking about planning your Christmas presents for 2011, you had better be quick. There are only a handful of outlets still stocking appropriate gifts. Most high street shops have moved on to introducing presents for Christmas 2012.
NEW ORLEANS - Brad Pitt is in the city they call the "Big Easy" working on the latest installment of the Indiana Jones series of motion pictures entitled Indiana Jones - The Search For The Alternative Lifestyle. The film is based on the book of th...
Washington - Amid accusations that President Obama is not doing enough to support the democratic revolution in Libya, the President announced that Moammar Gadhafi's name is to be taken off the official White House Christmas card list. "I wish to send...
Del Boy and Rodney have been fined for fraudulently running a "Lapland" Christmas Theme Park in Dorset. The wide boys tricked the punters into believing that they would be going into the Winter Wonderland of Lapland; they falsely claimed that the...
Brothers Henry and Victor Mears have been found guilty of eight charges of using their Lapland style theme park to create an accurate depiction of just how disappointing Christmas really can be. The two men, who set up the theme park in the New Fo...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The highly respected Washington newspaper The D.C. Dispatch Diplomat has broken the story about an alleged irregularity regarding The White House Christmas Party Fund. DC2D reporter Granola Dallydoo, 29, has been investigating t...
Model train manufacturer Horny has warned that its profits will be below forecasts because of the bad weather before Christmas. The much-loved company, which also owns model racing car system Scalextric and plastic model manufacturer Airfix, says...
The Smith family, from Barnstaple are still clearing up, after making the mistake of inviting their neighbours, a family of Tyrannosaurus Rexs to Christmas lunch. Mrs Smith told us: 'They are a new family to the area, and we felt that the polite,...
Bloodyvostock - (Na Zdrawie): Friday's Russian Orthodox Christmas started early last week... with the appearance on the Let Them Talk TV show of 'two red pussies' - one of which wasn't a lion cub. "Da...and the other wasn't Anya Kushchenko!" show...
Epiphany Police will be on the streets of the UK tonight ensuring that householders remove all Christmas decorations. "In previous years," said Chief of the Epiphany Police, John Baptiste, "we have had occasions where people have failed to remove...
Christmas was upon us, and was gone. Just like that. Snap of the finger quick! So says Joyce Merryweather, mother of two and home-maker to eight faux-family members. "We waited in, for over three weeks, waiting for the day. We sat watching adve...
At the close of yet another Holiday season, complete with all the social interaction stress, heartburn, and credit card debt, which causes a bit of its own monetary stress and heartburn, I hesitated over the proper opening words to this story because although plainly cliché, the description would be entirely accurate. That said, "It was a dark and stormy night". The clan of five was distrib...
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