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Spoof stories written by Zander Kaufman

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Funny story: Local weather man goes ape after ill-predicted weekend forecast

Local weather man goes ape after ill-predicted weekend forecast

Omaha, Nebraska- Stan Flowers a local weather man for WOAX channel 4, forecasted a bright sunny rain free weekend, weather great for the whole fami...

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Funny story: God to put humanity up for lease due to record low fundraising

God to put humanity up for lease due to record low fundraising

Today God Almighty announced that due to record low fundraising he is forced to put up humanity up for lease or possible sale. "It just costs too much, I mean the lighting bill up here is a real Bitch" God said in his east Haven penthouse.

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Funny story: Kermit the frog's assassin Slain in Police garage

Kermit the frog's assassin Slain in Police garage

An earlier report made to the spoof, told of the tragic events following an early morning parade in honor of the Muppets creator Jim Hanson. where In which Kermit the Frog, probably best known as Hanson's favorite creation was gunned down on the moto...

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Funny story: Will we ever have Drug Free radio?

Will we ever have Drug Free radio?

With the recent events with Rush’s search for the Rush, and Al Frankin’s promises of trying Drug free radio. It makes me wonder will we ever truly have drug free radio. Take in example the other day this guy was in my bank in line with me and for no reason walked up to me and introduced himself. and asked what I do for a living. I told him without stretching the truth, I told him I write s...

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Funny story: National draft may affect Local Procrastinator

National draft may affect Local Procrastinator

Broken Bow, Nebraska...

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Funny story: Klan announces new Hispanic membership

Klan announces new Hispanic membership

Hope, Arkansas Today the Klu Klux Klan announced that they will be seeking membership from Hispanics, Asians and Indian Americans. Gra...

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Funny story: Sharpton, Kuncinich, Nelson Beat the crap out of Kerry

Sharpton, Kuncinich, Nelson Beat the crap out of Kerry

Today while visiting a Kansas city liquor store presidential hopeful John Kerry was attacked.

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Funny story: ABE Lincoln Reanimates kicks President Bush's Ass, destroys White House

ABE Lincoln Reanimates kicks President Bush's Ass, destroys White House

Washington George Bush and country music star Toby Keith met with Chief burros of the MUGO islands today to thank him for there support in the invasion and occupation of Iraq, MUGO population 400 and is on the list of the coalition of the will...

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Funny story: Local man un-earths A-BOMB in back yard

Local man un-earths A-BOMB in back yard

Council Bluffs, Iowa-- Robert Walker, a local man, today got the attention of local police when he called 911 and told the operator that he found an atomic bomb in his backyard, while mowing his lawn. When the operator asked why he was mowing his law...

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Funny story: Whitehouse reveals the real reason for mars mission

Whitehouse reveals the real reason for mars mission

Whitehouse Press secretary Scott McClellan, told reporters today that the real reason for this sudden mars exploration plan was all due to a mistake.

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Funny story: Alaska passes law requiring the blind to Surrender eyeballs

Alaska passes law requiring the blind to Surrender eyeballs

Alaska passed a new law this week requiring all blind people, to have their eyeballs removed in order to prove they are not faking blindness in order collect payment checks from the government.

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Funny story: God gives Bush his walking papers

God gives Bush his walking papers

The almighty today announced that he is replacing President Bush by the end of the week.

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Funny story: Bush: Ozzy is in Dick's out

Bush: Ozzy is in Dick's out

In a stunning move today, President George Bush fired Vice President Cheney, and replaced him with heavy metal rock star Ozzy Osborne, in hope that he might rally younger voters.

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