Peter Mandelson the guy who is at the top of the list in every decision making board in Government has agreed to support a Green car. Under today's title as Business Secretary Mandelson has agreed to support the Ford Plant in Bridgend,with their £1.5...
"They're right," quipped an American car executive,"no one in their right mind wants to stand in front of them!" As the Toyota commercials flooded the air waves this past week, you couldn't turn on the TV without seeing a glowing Toyota commerci...
1. Throw everything out of the window that can lighten the vehicle. Oops, that's if you want the car to fly. 2. Have a passenger carefully crawl out onto the hood and pull off the spark plug wires. This will shut the engine down. 3. Lean out of the window as far as possible and carefully (remember you're speeding) shoot out all four tires with your handgun. The car will be hard to steer afte...
The latest must have sports car, set to be the fastest production car avaialbe, The Kamikaze was announced in Detroit today. A brief statement said, "We are proud to bring exclusively to America the latest in sports car innovation. It is the Kamik...
The President of the Toyoyo Corporation flew to Detroit today to announce the company's new sports car, The Kamikaze. A brief statement said, "We are proud to bring exclusively to America the latest in sports car innovation. It is the Kamikaze. A...
The Global leader in automobile production has halted production to assess the real issues. Motor vehicle group engineer Hiroshi Pe Domo claims a fault in the rubber quality of pedal treads for cars, trucks and SUVs manufactured globally. Li stat...
Japanese Prime Minister Yukio Hatoyama demanded that Barry Obama, CEO of Government Motors (GM) appear before the Diet to explain over 1.3m late recalls in certain models of Chevrolet and Pontiac models the US dumped on Japan during it's recent bank...
BMW has today announced that it is recalling every single model of all its cars due to a major attitude problem behind the steering wheel. A spokesperson for the automobile maker, who asked not to be named or touched by mere mortals, explained the...
After their success in defeating Google, the Chinese Hackers Society (CHS) has turned its attention to Japan. Since they discovered that the new Toyotas use wireless throttle control, they are now hacking the control systems of the Toyotas, and ar...
Ever gone shopping and been unable to park in the car park? Ever seen a dozen empty disabled parking bays? Now the Daily Fascist can reveal why. It is because not every disabled person in your area goes to the shops at the same time as you. The craft...
Responding to Political Advice from Aide Rahm Emanuel, Obama has decided to act more like Harry Truman than Hugo Chavez in an attempt to resurrect his failing presidency. His first act was to Nuke Toyota, putting 25,000 American factory workers build...
Beleaguered car maker Toyota has announced that it is to recall the wheels from all of its vehicles worldwide as a 'purely precautionary measure'. Toyota chairman Akio 'Tony' Toyoda today announced that whilst he regretted any inconvenience the m...
Not only are brakes failing, gas pedal sticking and suddenly launching you down the road at 100 MPH in a 30 MPH zone, now they are having trouble with seat belts. "I was driving around naked as I usually do on Saturday night", Rufus Henderson tol...
Detectives are investigating an incident in which Prince Andrew allegedly struck gold while driving into Buckingham Palace yesterday. The Grand Old Duke of Yorkie Bar reportedly made the strike as a policeman held him up at the Palace gates to gro...
Beleaguered auto manufacturer Toyota may be in store for consumer lawsuits based on loss of value after Kelley Blue Book, a leading used-car value service, lowered its estimated resale prices for the recalled models by 2.5% to 3.5%. The resulting...
The motor industry is in turmoil over the recall of several leading manufacturer's shitty cars but it now emerges that the most beloved vehicles of them all - the Reliant Robin - has also serious flaws that require a return to the garage. The Rel...
Reports of vehicles being recalled because of faulty airbags has caused a world-wide panic. Recently cars have been seen drifting heaven-wards after crashes. It seems their airbags were mistakingly filled with HELIUM, causing them to rise like...
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