New Yawk, New Yawk --- In an attempt to boost the ratings of his Fox News show, Geraldo At Large, Gerardo Rivera posted a nearly nude photograph of himself--or, rather, his mirror image--on Twitter. Minutes later, it had been deleted, although it is...
With all the controversy surrounding the verdict on the Trayvon Martin case, Sean Hannity announced today, "George Zimmerman could've been me 35 years ago." Said the voluble host from Fox News: "Hey! I grew up in the mean streets of Franklin S...
WASILLA, Alaska - Sarah Palin is thrilled that she has just been given a job at FOX News. She told GOPicky Magazine that she feels that she like the FOX Netowrk slogan is fair and balanced. She smiled and said "Well ya know maybe at times I ai...
LOS ANGELES - Two longtime View hosts, Joy Behar and Elisabeth Hasselbeck are leaving the daytime talk show. Behar plans to open up a clothes-optional comedy club in the Bronx and Hasselbeck has been signed to appear on FOX News to basically give...
NEW YORK CITY - Executives at FOX News have just issued a job offer to NSA leaker Edward Snowden. A spokesperson for the news network, Wally "Dimples" Kimsinetti, 31, told the news media that in the eyes of the guys at the "Fair and Impartial" net...
WASHINGTON, D. C. -- Psychiatrists privately suggest that President Barack Obama may be developing paranoia. "He seems to believe that everyone is out to get him," Dr. Hy Mann said, off the record. Another shrink. Dr. Si Ko, agreed with his co...
WASHINGTON, D. C. - With the stroke of a pen, President Barak Obama signed an executive order by which 1600 Pennsylvania is no longer part of the United States. "We've seceded," First Lady Michelle Obama confirmed rumors that the nation's capitol is...
On FOX and Fiends Sarah Palin announced that she will rejoin the network most evenings on a show she's calling Sarah Palin Disseminates the Lamestream Media. Explained Palin: "I will provide a prospectus that you don't ordinarily get from the l...
Harley Quinn died last week at a Glenn Beck event. The 47 year-old comic assigned to Beck by The Ruling Authority choked on his own words and died on-stage before an audience of Mr. Beck's fans. The county coroner, a Republican appointee, ruled t...
LOS ANGELES - Jim Carrey is fit to be tied as he continues to get hammered by members of the fair and impartial folks at the Fox Network. Tittle Tattle Tonight reporter Tapioca Swizzle stated that the whole matter was ignited when an unnamed Fox t...
When the State of the Union rebuttal is drowned out by the speaker touching his face and drinking water it's time to admit, "Talking about liberals is just boring." No one is freaking out enough to watch 24 hour news coverage about fixing bridges,...
National Rifle Association CEO and gun-rights martyr Wayne LaPierre likely was not expecting to be shot at as he celebrated the day after Gun Appreciation Day by shooting off his mouth with Sean Hannity on the Fox Comedy Network. LaPierre said he...
WASHINTON, DC (ABSNN) - President Barack Obama carried on the tradition of pardoning a turkey this Thanksgiving, but the recipient of the clemency, Karl Rove, was not at all impressed. "We received requests to pardon more than 50,000 turkeys this...
Castor oil, Fox News, MSNBC, and nekkid chicks on air! When I was a young kid, I knew better than to tell my Dad that I had a belly-ache. I knew better because I knew what my Dad would do if I told him my gut hurt. He was an old school mountain farmer: he used plant extracts he called "Lightning Hot drops," or, if he was a bit hung over, he used the all-time, get-even-with-your-children, gut-...
On the heels of an election that came as no surprise to math aficionados like Nate Silver but left a presidential candidate, Fox News anchors and viewers "shell-shocked", confused, angry and even crying, Fox News President Roger Ailes announced the n...
A new Fox News poll out today shows African American Mormons would have likely voted for Presidential candidate Mitt Romney in large numbers, if only there were any Black Mormons. Romney, reached during a vacation stop in Asheville North Carolina...
Four more years of President Obama. That's what the American people have decided. After a close race Obama came out on top beating his challenger Mitt Romney. While some are delighted with the result, others are devastated. Fox News' chief o...
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