After years of playing the stupid little girl Horny Montoona for the demonic Dismal Network, and then overnight turning into a pornographic female version of Krampus the Christmas Demon and "twerking" up a tempest on stage for a few months, (Twerking...
Hillary Clinton decided that if she isn't going to win the Presidency (Dictatorship) of the USA she will cut off "little Hill" and send it around the world on tour.
Finally a solution to stop the "TERRIS" crisis plaguing the United States. According to the guy that lives behind the rubbish bins, out back down the pub, Headsonpikes Inc. is running a contest offering a free trip to an underground, nucle...
To help the worldwide food crisis brought on by President Bush, hundreds of barrels of manatee vomit made into loaves were shipped in to the hideously disgusting African port of Ngumbobzuti Zhambouti on cargo ships this week.
"You can't even make a risotto?" Gordon Ramsey shouts at the UN Food Crisis Management Meeting today. "Shut it down, shut the kitchen down."...
Scientists and loafers, slackers, and losers at the Invisible Box University have determined that the most dangerous job in the world is a mime. A mime is more than 25 times more likely to die on the job than a crab fisherman or a test pilot. It...
Expert economics professor Elmereesha Eelsniffer at Stanford University in California just finished a study. So says a flying chimp that nearly broke the windshield of my car on the way into OZ today. The study was an economical feasibility study to...
The entire Bush Mob and staff left town today and began gathering up all the children in the United States.
Snug Harbor, FL - Thousands of senior citizens, elderly folks, old farts, and just plain "Age-Challenged" are coming back to their nursing homes, assisted living facilities, and their houses wasted off their asses and then dying - according...
Democratic Republic of The Congo - Children affected by war in eastern Democratic Republic of Congo face starvation, says the UN food agency.
Shitterton, Dorset, England - Shitterton is a hamlet in the village of Bere Regis in the Purbeck district of Dorset, England, between Poole and Dorchester. The village had about 1,797 Shittertoners in 2001.
Wetwang, Yorkshire - I'm told I come from Twatt, Orkney, Shetland Islands, Scotland so who am I to larf at stupid things in Britain. Of course I had to get out of Twatt as soon as I was about 15 and had the means to do. I joined the circus but that's another entirely different story isn't it? Or for those of you from California, "That's a whole nother story". Cringe.
A plane carrying Hillary Clinton just ditched in the Atlantic Ocean this evening on the way back to New York from Indianapolis Indiana according to an invisible man in my garage who sits on a flaming rope.
A giant talking penis is making comments wherever it goes and getting on the news right and left and some people are calling for it to finally be circumcised once and for all.
Health experts in New York and Florida have discovered what makes people who move to Florida just as obnoxious as they were up in New York. One would think they would move down here and retire and have nothing to do but enjoy retirement and the nice...
Keeping the church (you praying) and the state (state highways) separate is the reason for the season.
In order to make the country safer, U.S. Vice President Dick Chain and a few of his comrades from the orifices of Der Homeland Security are now handing out death sentences for all people at airports wearing hats.
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