Scientists and loafers, slackers, and losers at the Invisible Box University have determined that the most dangerous job in the world is a mime. A mime is more than 25 times more likely to die on the job than a crab fisherman or a test pilot.
It wasn't hard to come to a solid conclusion because the University was offered a grant of a million US dollars to discover this trivial fact, and everyone knows it doesn't take a million dollars to get on Gargle and look up statistics on that kind of thing.
Here are some of the results garnered from the studies:
- Mimes get killed in more bizarre ways than other workers.
- Mimes explode because someone who is afraid of them puts grenades in their hat.
- Doctors of well known mimes have been known to poison their patients because of the rivalry between the two similar occupations. A doctor will walk in to see a sick or injured person in the hospital and say blah blah blah scrotum, yack yack yack remove your money, blah blah, any questions okay bye. Just like a mime.
- A mime could care less how you are doing and just wants your money and good luck talking to one.
There's just all kinds of things that happen when one becomes a mime. Anyone contemplating a career change to mime, think twice. The life expectancy is 2 weeks.
The mime schools won't tell you that.
