You finally get old enough to stay home by yourself so that the parents can go on a vacation all by themselves and the very first night you get a call: "Everything OK there, Son?"
"Yes dad, I'm 33 now, everything is fine!"
"And how's the house?"
"I'm glad you asked. The house is sick, Dad. It's got the shingles. It may not live till you and Mom return next week."
-Adam Shame
