"Ode To An Old Battleass!"

Submitted by Bureau

Sunday, 18 August 2013

Listen to this, Myrtle. It was one of those epipins..epigraphs that Jack Knockwurst saw while visiting up north. She...He.."

"Moley, tell me when you're sober."

"Can't. I won't remember a thing. Let me get it right in my head. Oh yeah. Jack Knockwurst said he was out in a cemetery. We call them graveyards but up north they call them Cemetery. I wonder why?"

Moley, tell me the thing and go to bed.

Alright. Now here's what was on a tombstone there. I think they call them monuments..I wonder"


"Here lies the body of Anna,
Done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,
But the skin of the thing that made he go! Haw Haw poot! Haw!"

"Funny alright. A decent young woman falls and breaks her neck so you characters down at the pub can laugh at her. Go up to your room!"

"Women has no scents of humor. I'll go up. Put the broom away. But I'm going to write your epitooth! See how you lack that!"

-I.B. Moleturd

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