Definitions Dictionary for the Dyslexic

Submitted by Inchcock

Sunday, 8 April 2012

Antelope (v):
To run off with your mother's sister.

Assassination (n):
An arrangement to meet a donkey.

Baptist (n):
Junior hamburger chef.

Basket (n):
A short nap in the sun.

Circumstantial (n):
Circumcision on a really big baby.

Collonade (n):
Fizzy enema.

Defence (n):
Something to sit on for people who can't make up their minds.

Diarrhoea (n):
A very unattractive bottom.

Dictator (n):
Hilariously shaped, edible tuber.

Dipthong (v):
To wash a lady's undergarment.

Diversion (n):
Princess of Wales' version of the events that led to her divorce.

Dumpling (n):
Small lump of excrement.

Gastronome (n):
Small person prone to excess wind.

Harbinger (n):
Hard drinker.

Hatchet (n):
Small, bird droppings that fall from the sky.

Headband (n):
Top of the bill at a rock concert.

Hormone (n):
The sound a prostitute makes when she's not been paid.

Hobnob (n):
Cooking accident often suffered by nudists.

Homophobe (n):
Strong dislike of The Simpsons.

Honeydew (n:
Women who regularly arrives late for appointments.

Induction (n):
Induced labour in a duck.

Innuendo (n):
Italian suppository.

Intercontinental (n):
Person who has wet themselves all over the world.

Labiate (v):
Perform cunnilingus.

Laminate (v):
To artificially inseminate a sheep.

Limpet (n):
Male who has trouble getting an erection.

Lobster (n):
Colloquial term for a female who ejaculates during orgasm.

Mantrap (n):
Sexual favour used by women to obtain money from men.

Mastiff (n):
Mass erections induced by watching pornography.

Menopause (n):
Break in conversation to allow men to get a word in edgeways.

Minjita (n) (slang):
An Indian lesbian.

Misfit (n):
An attractive young woman.

Mislay (n):
A brazen or promiscuous young woman.

Morbific (n):
Excessively violent.

Multilingual (n):
Engaging in cunnilingus with multiple partners.

Negligent (n):
Cross-dresser.

Ostentatious:
Make and model of a pre-war British luxury car.

Outage (n):
Process of exposing a Gay politician.

Portent (n):
The Millennium Dome.

Propaganda (n):
A wooden support for one-legged male geese.

Rapscallion (n):
Black, American spring onion.

Rectitude (n):
Precise angle at which a rectal thermometer should be inserted.

Reflex (v):
Renew wiring to an electrical appliance.

Restitution (n):
Sanatorium for lactating women.

Skulduggery (n):
Archaeological excavation.

Snuff box (n):
Slang term for a coffin.

Spade (n):
Small surgical tool for removing ovaries.

Testator (n):
A male who is constantly adjusting his genitalia.

Titillate (n):
Delayed onset of female puberty.

Titular (n & adj):
Busty woman.

Vagrant: (n):
Confused insect.

Willy-nilly (n):
Male who continually catches their penis in their zipper.


Go to top
43 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more