10. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the Earth.
9. You can see one key and three locks.
8. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
7. You take off, your socks and them in the oven.
6. You can focus better with one eye closed.
5. You fall off the floor.
5. The whole bar greets you when you come in.
4. You haven't had a driver's license in such a long time that you have forgotten what one looks like.
3. You start fancying John Prescott.
2. You don't recognise your wife/husband unless seen through bottom of glass.
1. You spent more time on the floor than you do standing up.