Dr. Nozital, world renowned expert on the odd and unusual, has gracefully agreed to provide answers to some of our reader's most pressing questions.
Interviewer: Dr. Nozital, why are birds so ugly?
Dr. Nozital: If you had your pecker between your eyes, you'd look ugly too.
Interviewer: Dr. Nozital, why are school houses red?
Dr. Nozital: If you had seven periods a day, you'd turn red too.
Interviewer: Why are pool tables green?
Dr. Nozital: If somebody'd been racking your balls all day, you'd turn green too.
Interviewer: Why does Peter Pan fly?
Dr. Nozital: If somebody tried hitting your peter with a pan, you'd fly too.
