Lipstick commercials are a pain in the butt. In fact, all those cosmetic products are a pain. How can putting grease on my lips make them more kissable? Oh, I don't mind plucking out a few stray hairs but added make-up to look like "You are not wearing make-up" is ridiculous! And those false Bambi eyelashes! Would a set of those make my ass look any smaller?
-Ms. Red Balls, Politician's wife
