How I Became Famous

Submitted by j.w.

Friday, 3 December 2010

I fished out the piece of paper from my pocket to read my Poem to the great assemblage. Too late I realised it was the shopping list from last week:

Porridge
Coffee
Milk
Bread
Bacon
Rhubarb

And so it went on.

At the end the stunned audience rose and cheered. A scene not seen at a poetry reading since Howl.

The accolades were overwhelming. 'How inventive!', 'Transforming the ordinary into the extrordinary.'

I was a hero.

So I thought I'd turn my hand to Art and submitted a picture to a prestigious exhibition. It had taken a lot out of me and was entitled 'A Blank Sheet of Paper'. It was snapped up for £1 million and is now worth three times more. At an exhibition I suggested that anyone could add to the picture if they wanted to. I was met by fury from the Art Director: 'We could not have your exhibit defaced' he cried.

I have my mind on something musical but I will keep quiet about that.

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